You Broke My Heart, But I’m Still Grateful We Loved Each Other

You Broke My Heart, But I’m Still Grateful We Loved Each Other ©iStock/max-kegfire

Love. It’s a real bitch, isn’t it? You think you’ve finally found the perfect person, only to have it fall apart in the end. It happens over and over again, and yet we still keep on trying. It must be because of how wonderful a relationship is when it’s going well. Despite the way things end, there are positives to gain from every romance.

  1. You were the best person I ever dated. We didn’t work out in the end, but out of all my exes, you’re the closest I’ve had to what I actually want. You were a grown-up with ambition and morals and character. You have a sweet soul and a quiet humor lurking underneath your shyness. Even if you weren’t quite the right person for me, at least I know I’m getting there.
  2. You’re a good human being. Regardless of the pain and suffering we caused each other eventually, I still believe you’re a good person. I don’t judge you or blame you for what happened. I know that I hurt you too. You let me go because you knew it was best for both of us, even though I wanted to deny it.
  3. We had so much in common. I had more fun with you than I’ve had with any other romantic partner. We liked so many of the same things, and you were always down for whatever. I loved that about you. Whether it was a tough hike or a day at the museum, you were all in with a smile on your face. I’ve never had so much in common with anyone else I’ve dated.
  4. I just adored you. The bottom line — and the reason it was so difficult to lose you — was that I always loved you so much, no matter what. You were my entire heart. Even when I knew it wasn’t working out, I stayed in it because I cared about you more than anything. I wish it had been different. I wish we had wanted the same things. It simply wasn’t meant to be.
  5. You made me feel beautiful. Your smile lit up the room every time I walked through a door. You were so genuinely happy to see me and so loving towards me that I always felt good about myself. Even later, when it wasn’t so great anymore and you stopped complimenting me, I knew deep down that you always thought I was beautiful inside and out.
  6. You believed in me. In a time when I didn’t have much faith in myself, you gave me encouragement and strength. I know now that I need to have that within and that my insecurity was part of our problem. I wish I had been a stronger, more independent person, but I’m grateful for your positive reinforcement and caring words. You always told me I could accomplish anything I wanted.
  7. We had some incredible times. The memories I made with you are forever a part of my heart. I couldn’t forget them or leave them behind if I tried. You helped expose me to parts of myself I didn’t even know existed before, and we shared amazing experiences. I’ll always love you for giving me those memories, even if it makes me sad to think of them sometimes.
  8. Our troubles taught me a lot. Despite the pain and heartache our fights caused me at the time, I learned how to deal with conflict in relationships because of them. They taught me when it’s time to get out, when an issue isn’t resolvable, and how to comprehend that an argument doesn’t have to mean breaking up. I have a lot of issues related to my past and I realized they were all coming into play when we fought.
  9. You helped me conquer fears. Sometimes I hated you for it. Your methods may have been faulty, but you did push me and I did overcome in spite of myself. Now I know how to push myself because I no longer have you to do it for me. I miss you, but I’m grateful that I can stand on my own.
  10. I tried my best to make it work. I do honestly believe I did everything I could, and I will never regret trying to keep us together. You probably could’ve done more, or done things differently, but I can’t control that. I can only control my own actions. While I’m not proud of how I behaved at times, I do know that I loved you very much and did everything I could think of to make you happy.
  11. You taught me what I truly want in a partner. I learned a lot about what I need in a partner from our relationship. You fulfilled a lot of it. You didn’t fulfill a lot of it. Either way, it helped open my eyes to where my priorities lie and what’s actually important to me. There are certain deal breakers I’ll never ignore again. There are also certain positive qualities I won’t overlook again.
  12. You breaking my heart made me stronger. Like it or not, this was the most mature breakup I’ve ever had. The hardest part was that we never stopped loving each other. We simply had to admit that it wasn’t working. This was intensely difficult for me. I’ve never had to walk away from someone I still cared for very deeply because we wanted different things from life. I couldn’t let go of you. It seemed so wrong to lose someone I loved so much. Sadly, it had to be done and I went through hell because of it. I came out on the other side of the fire stronger, surer, and completely transformed.
A former actress who has always loved the art of the written word, Amy is excited to be here sharing her stories! She just completed her first novel, and is also a contributor for Elite Daily, Dirty & Thirty, and Thought Catalog. Amy is the founder of What If Journey and can be found on Twitter @amyhorton18. You can also visit her website at