It sounds crazy to say this, but when my ex broke up with me on my birthday out of all the days he could’ve chosen, it opened my eyes and made me thankful that he was leaving my life.
I knew something was wrong. Call it women’s intuition, call it being sick and tired of the same old relationship issues, but I knew that the end was in sight. When he broke up with me, I felt more relieved than anything else.
He had clearly checked out of the relationship. Not only was he breaking up with me on my birthday but he completely forgot it was my birthday to start with. It was clear that he no longer cared about me. For someone to forget such an important date on the calendar was proof that he wasn’t interested in the finer details about me. Basically, the breakup was happening for a reason. Maybe he wasn’t even aware of that reason, but it was a good time for us to part ways.
I was already in breakup mode anyway. Seeing as though I’d been expecting the breakup to happen for a while, it wasn’t such a surprise when he told me we had to talk. The thing is, I was expecting things to end for a while, which is why I was so relieved when it actually happened. I didn’t want to continue to live in a state of anticipation, wondering when he was going to end things.
My birthday was a chance for a new beginning. Although it was hard to deal with the sadness of a breakup on my birthday when I wanted to have a party and enjoy myself, I remembered a rule I live by, which is that my birthday is always what I like to call my New Year. While some people view January 1st as a chance for a new start, I see my birthday that way.
I was actually grateful to him for letting me go. Thinking about him ending things on my birthday made me decide he was actually releasing me back into the excitement of life. It was my brand new beginning and I was looking forward to it. I could start the next chapter of my life without having ties to my past.
I could do anything I wanted. Without my ex in my life on the most important day of my year, I could do whatever the heck I wanted. He never used to like going to clubs or hanging out with my BFFs, so that’s exactly what I did without any guilt! It was amazing not to have to worry about first running my birthday ideas past him.
The birthday ended up being amazing. I was worried that even though I was having a good time doing what I wanted, the day would always remind me of my ex. When my friends heard that he dumped me on my birthday, they’d expressed horror, which kind of rubbed off on me, but not for long. The great thing was that I made such great memories that my ex faded into the distance of my past.
The breakup caught up with me. Although I felt liberated after that breakup, I was distracted by all the fun I was having. I felt like I had to make up for lost time—seven months, in fact—that had gone to my lousy ex. Admittedly, the breakup feelings did catch up with me about two weeks after my birthday and I had to unpack my feelings and sort through them. I knew that day would come eventually, but I dealt with them the best I could.
I wouldn’t give him that day. The most important thing for me is that I refused to let getting dumped screw up my birthday or my mood. That was my day and no one would bring me down! He did me a favor by cutting me loose and I’m glad I made the most of it.
It also set the tone for my future. By refusing to let the breakup bring me down, I focused on my bright future and that really helped me to get over the breakup and all the feelings surrounding it. The thing is, there’s always the choice to feel whatever I want to. The guy might’ve chosen our breakup on that day, but he had zero control over what I chose to feel. See ya!
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