While we all want to believe every guy is good and decent, history tells us that’s not true. There are so many arrogant liars out there, and chances are you’ve dated several. No more! It’s time to start attracting the right guys so you can stop wasting your time and find someone worthy, but how? Here are 11 bulletproof ways to attract “The One.”
- Don’t Play Games. Stop purposely waiting an hour to respond to texts and avoiding phone calls. You might think the only way to get a guy is to play hard to get, but that’s not true. The right guy doesn’t want a girl who’s always leaving him on read — he wants a girl who’s not insecure when left on read.
- Treat Yourself Well. Attract the right guy by investing in yourself. Whether that means working full-time to pay the bills or getting an education to further your career, the right guy wants a woman who’s working hard to be the best version of themselves. He doesn’t want to be your savior or your knight in shining armor. He’s looking for a partner, and that means someone who’s self-sufficient.
- Keep Your Deal Breakers Close. First things first, figure out what your deal breakers are. Do you want to avoid guys who smoke? What about guys who still live with their parents? Whatever your deal breakers are, make sure you stay to true to them when you’re dating. Don’t ignore all the red flags just because he likes you and has an award-winning smile.
- Leave Your Bedroom. You can’t seem to attract the right guy, huh? Maybe it’s because you don’t leave your bedroom. To meet him, you’re going to have to take off your pajamas and go outside. You don’t have to frequent clubs or bars. In fact, you shouldn’t if you’re not comfortable in that kind of setting. Go to farmers’ markets, a Sunday service, or ask your friends to set you up. Whatever you do, don’t just sit at home complaining.
- Be Vulnerable. The worst thing you can do is lie about who you are. If you want a guy who’s in tune with his emotions, you need to be in tune with yours. You can’t put up walls and expect him to read your mind. If your ex left you heartbroken, you need to be upfront about that so your new guy has the opportunity to show you he’s nothing like your ex. To put it simply, you can’t bullshit. Because the right guy will know and leave.
- Meet Their Standards. Maybe you’re not attracting the right guy because you aren’t meeting his standards. Sorry if that sounds harsh, but think about it: good guys want good girls. They don’t want cheaters, manipulators, or women who’re too indecisive to make big decisions. Consider the fact that it might be you. Then work on improving yourself and growing into a better person.
- Be Confident. Most of us don’t wake up confident but we aim to find a partner who’s self-assured. Ironic, isn’t it? It takes work to feel comfortable in your own skin and sometimes you have to fake it to make it. So, start faking. Walk with your head held high and try being 100% honest with people. The more open you are, the more people will like you — and the more you’ll like yourself.
- Respect Yourself. In order to attract the right guy, you need to have respect for yourself. If you don’t, you’ll end up letting disrespectful people into your life. Sound familiar? One of the reasons you keep dating the wrong dudes is because you don’t speak up when there’s a problem. It’s important you stay true to yourself and never put your emotions on the back-burner.
- Lead With Friendship. You might not love the idea of being a friend first, but honestly, there’s something to be said about leading with this kind of connection. It lets you get to know each other on a deeper level without any pressure. You don’t have to worry about coming in too hot, and he doesn’t have to worry about committing too soon. Plus, the right guy won’t want to go from 0 to 100. He’ll want to take his time so he doesn’t hurt anyone’s feelings.
- Respect Your Partner. You want a guy who’s respectful but to get him, you need to be respectful too. You can’t ignore what he says or talk over him. Guys need to feel listened to and appreciated just like you. Be polite with your words and kind with your actions. No one wants to feel disrespected by a significant other, so make sure you treat him the way you want to be treated.
- Trust That It’ll Happen. It’s difficult to be single when you don’t want to be single. We get it. But that doesn’t mean you should put pressure on yourself. If you do, you’ll start to see “The One” in every guy you walk by—and trust me, they aren’t all special. Believe it’ll happen when it’s supposed to happen and let yourself have fun while you wait. Keep going out and meeting new people, but don’t do it just to find a guy — do it because human connection is what keeps this world moving.
