Why Being Called A Guy’s “Crazy Ex” Is A Compliment, Not An Insult

No one wants to be the “crazy ex,” but you know what? Sometimes what guys call crazy is really strong, smart, and out of their league. Here are 14 reasons why being that crazy ex can be good for you.

  1. It means you stood up for something. Guys might call you crazy for taking a stand, defending yourself, and not backing down. But doing those things is awesome! It means you value and stay true to yourself.
  2. You really cared. He might tell future girlfriends that you were so crazy because you were clingy, but you know what? At least you had the guts to care about him and show him that he mattered. Pity he couldn’t do the same for you.
  3. You keep your standards high. If a guy can’t meet your standards, he might say they’re too high and you’re so crazy for expecting him to be able to reach them. Oh please. What he’s really saying is that he can’t meet them because of his own laziness or insecurities. That isn’t your problem.
  4. You know when to walk away. You treated him well but loved yourself more. That means you didn’t let him walk all over you or take advantage of your love. It’s convenient for him to call you crazy for walking away, but you had to. You were out of his league and he knows it.
  5. You know what you want. You want to be in a relationship that satisfies you in every way, and that’s your right. You told your ex when you felt unsatisfied in the relationship in the hope that you could work on issues. Maybe he felt like he could never please you, earning you the “crazy girlfriend” title, but really he just couldn’t give you what you wanted. You’d have been crazy if you stayed with him!
  6. You’re open about your feelings. Maybe he said you were too sensitive, like when you got upset because he didn’t call you when he said he would. Fuck what he thinks. At least you weren’t afraid to communicate your feelings and be real.
  7. You learn from your mistakes. Maybe you really were the “crazy girlfriend” as in really crazy. You stalked the guy or threw violent tantrums. Yikes. The important thing is that you’ve learned from those mistakes, which makes you a much stronger and amazing girlfriend to future partners.
  8. You expect respect. He was the one who made you crazy by flirting with other women or making you feel worthless. But now you’re wearing the “crazy” label? Damn, if wanting to be respected and loved makes you crazy, then it’s better to be crazy than sane and get out of his life before he disrespects you further.
  9. You have vision. You were crazy about this guy and wanted to build a future with him. If that freaked him out, it really just highlighted that he’s a man-child who’s afraid of commitment. Ugh, what a loser.
  10. You fought for the relationship. Yeah, maybe those late-night fights made the relationship toxic. But at least you cared enough to work on things. It’s fine and well for him to say you were crazy for holding onto the relationship, but he’s the one who lost a woman who’d fight for him. He was lucky to have such a passionate, tough woman in his life.
  11. You slay the sexists. He made sexist jokes and treated other women like they were inferior but thought you were unreasonable for getting angry about it. What the hell? It’s not like he was saying that stuff about you, he says. Ugh. He needs to get a clue. Any woman worth her salt is going to ditch guys who are sexist, whether to her or other women. It’s the girl code. Plus, if he treats other women like crap, he’ll end up treating his girlfriend in the same way.
  12. You have no regrets. The person who loves fully, fights for the relationship, shows how they feel even if it embarrasses them, and is passionate is the one who can walk away from a broken relationship and have zero regrets. That’s you. He’s probably going to kick himself for losing you, but that’s his problem. At least you can walk away with closure.
  13. You’re better without him. Sometimes a bad relationship is what makes you crazy and it takes leaving it to realize that you weren’t the problem, he was. If your partner was toxic and brought out the worst in you, it made you feel or act crazy, but it was a useful experience. It showed you how important it is to find someone who makes you be the best you can be instead of brings you down.
  14. You made him a better man. Sure, he might tell future girlfriends that you were crazy, but you know what? You probably made him a better man. You showed him how to treat a woman the right way. That time you threw a drink all over his white shirt, you showed him that he can’t get away with being an a-hole because he’ll end up alone (and have expensive dry-cleaning bills). He might not learn from your relationship, but hopefully he does. If so, his future girlfriend should send you a check!
Giulia Simolo is a writer from Johannesburg, South Africa with a degree in English Language and Literature. She has been working as a journalist for more than a decade, writing for sites including AskMen, Native Interiors, and Live Eco. You can find out more about her on Facebook and LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter @GiuliaSimolo.