If You Can’t Commit, Then I Quit

If You Can’t Commit, Then I Quit

Fear of commitment is a serious phobia… that men need to get over. I’m done with guys who hold off on making things official and settling down. From now on, if you can’t commit to me, then we’re over. Here’s why:

  1. I’m not going to waste my time. What do you expect me to do? Waiting for you isn’t an option for me. I don’t want to waste my time on a guy who might never be ready for something real. Instead, I’ll throw you back into the sea and find a man who won’t be afraid to actually be with me.
  2. If I was the right girl for you, you’d want to be with me. The truth is that you don’t want to commit to me because deep down you don’t really think we’re right for each other. You don’t like me enough to be with me and as much as that may hurt, I have to accept that. If I was the girl that you couldn’t live without then we’d already be together. We’re not because I’m not, and that’s the harsh truth.
  3. I have self-respect. I’m too good to be with a guy who doesn’t think I’m a catch. I’m not just going to sit by and let you treat me like crap just because I have feelings for you. I respect myself way too much to allow a guy to continue to hurt me, regardless of how much I care about him. I refuse to lie down and let a man walk all over me.
  4. I want a man who knows how to appreciate me. I’m an amazing woman. I know that and I need to be with a man who knows that too. You should feel just as lucky to have found me as I am to have found you. I won’t be taken for granted. I’m a one of a kind girl and I’ll make one hell of a girlfriend, but I won’t do the work without the appreciation.
  5. I’m done letting guys lead me on. I’ve let it happen too many times, and I’m finally choosing to stand up for myself. I want a real relationship and I’m done settling for anything else. If you don’t really like me, then don’t be with me. I’d rather you tell me you’re just not that interested than lead me to believe that we could have a future. If you don’t see us ever being in a relationship, then do the kind thing and let me go.
  6. I want a real relationship. I’m sick of living in the almost land. Almost relationships and casual dating just aren’t enough for me. There comes a time when keeping things casual is just an excuse and we either need to commit to each other or call it quits. I’m sick of my status being “it’s complicated.” I want to be single or in a relationship and I’m done with anything in between.
  7. I don’t have casual sex. I know casual sex is all the rage right now, but it’s not for me. Hookup culture might be a part of modern dating, but who says I have to conform to the new social norm? I’ve never had uncommitted sex and I don’t plan to change that. Sex is important to me, so if you want to be in my bed, you’d better be able to show that I’m important to you.
  8. I’ll always love myself enough to walk away. I don’t care how much I like you — if you can’t treat me right then I’m gone. If continuing the “relationship” is painful to me, I’m obviously better off ending things. I want to be with a man who brings me joy, not pain.
  9. I shouldn’t have to beg, plead, or even ask you to be with me. You should want to be with me all on your own. I don’t want to be with a man who makes me feel like I’m not good enough. If you don’t want to commit to me, I’m going to constantly be analyzing why that is, but I won’t let you eat away at my self-esteem.
  10. I don’t want to even try to change you. I’m not the kind of girl who’s interested in trying to reform a player. I only want to date men who are ready for something real. I’m a relationship girl so if you just want to “have fun” and “keep things casual” then you’re barking up the wrong tree. You are who you are and I am who I am and I neither of us are going to change, so I won’t waste my time trying.
  11. I won’t deal with your commitment issues. This is your cross to bear and it’s a struggle you’re going to have to deal with on your own. I’m not going to wait patiently by your side while you try to figure things out. If you’re not ready for a relationship, then you shouldn’t be dating a relationship girl.
Kelsey Dykstra is a freelance writer based in Huntington Beach, CA. She has been blogging for over four years and writing her whole life. Originally from Michigan, this warm weather seeker relocated to the OC just last summer. She enjoys writing her own fictional pieces, reading a variety of young adult novels, binging on Netflix, and of course soaking up the sun.