10 Signs He Can’t Handle What A Strong, Badass Woman You Are

You’re a strong, smart, funny, independent woman and you should be proud of it. Not only that, the person you’re dating should be too. If the guy you’re with is doing any of these 10 things, though, it’s clear he’s not up to the task of being with such a dynamic babe.

  1. He texts you constantly when he knows you’re busy. He knows you’re at your BFF’s birthday party or your work’s Christmas dinner tonight, but that doesn’t stop him from texting repeatedly, asking who’s there and what you’re doing and when you’ll be home. Instead of feeling secure in the relationship and trusting that you’re loyal, he’s insecure because he knows what a catch you are and he’s afraid someone else is going to grab you out from under his nose.
  2. He wants to know your whereabouts 24/7.  This is a continuation of the above. Whenever you’re not with him, he wants to know exactly where you are, who you’re with, and what’s going on. It’s like you can’t breathe! He’s taking the fact that he’s intimidated by your badassness out on you and it’s total BS.
  3. He brags constantly about how much money he makes. It doesn’t matter what career you’re in or that you couldn’t care less about his bank balance. He’s fully aware of how incredible you are and the only way he can think to try and impress you in return is by bragging about his cash. Little does he realize that all you really want is for him to be a kind, caring partner. Talk about clueless!
  4. He hints that a lot of other women are interested in him. It’s a bit of reverse psychology at play here because he’s terrified of losing you but doesn’t want to let on. No, he’d rather you believe that you’re the lucky one to have him so that you don’t get any big ideas of leaving him behind. This is dumb and never works. Nice try, bozo.
  5. He tells you that you’re “too much” sometimes. If he insinuates that you need to “tone it down” or tries to stifle your personality when you’re out in the world together, he’s a jerk and he can’t cope with how amazing you are. His ego is clearly pretty fragile and he doesn’t feel like he’s on your level, so he wants to bring you down to his. Screw that.
  6. He seems like he’s in constant competition with you. Your partner is supposed to be your biggest cheerleader, but instead this guy seems like your biggest competitor. Every accomplishment you make, he wants to one-up you on it. It’s nice to know that he recognizes your ambition and success but not so nice that he feels the need to outdo you at every turn.
  7. He discourages you from pursuing your goals and dreams. In his eyes, the more goals you smash and the higher you climb, the further below you he’ll be and he can’t handle that. Instead of pushing you to reach your ultimate potential, he encourages you to settle for good enough, and that’s never OK. What’s wrong with this dude?
  8. He negs you. Ah, the ole backhanded compliment—a classic move among insecure pricks who just can’t handle an amazing woman. If he subtly tries to talk down to you about your job, your makeup, your weight, your friends, your clothes, or anything else, it’s because he wants to exert some kind of control over you to feel better about himself. Leave him ASAP.
  9. He never shows you off to his family, friends, or colleagues. While most guys would be proud to show off such a boss babe to the other people in their lives, this one is trying to keep you under wraps. It’s like he’s afraid that if he parades you around, you’ll outshine him and everyone will know he’s punching above his weight. Grow a pair, bro.
  10. He straight up tells you that he can’t keep up with you. It doesn’t get much clearer than that. This is kind of the best case scenario since it’s always better to know that a dude’s just not on your level than to waste valuable time and energy trying to make something work when it never will. Thank him for his honesty, wish him the best, and move on.
Jennifer has been the managing editor of Bolde since its launch in 2014. Before that, she was the founding editor of HelloGiggles and also worked as an entertainment writer for Bustle and Digital Spy. Her work has been published in Bon Appetit, Decider, Vanity Fair, The New York TImes, and many more.