Couple Cliches: 7 Annoying Things You’re Doing Together

Finding someone you really connect with is rare, and falling in love and embarking on a serious adult relationship is a wonderful and life-changing experience. The feelings for your other half can be strong to the point of being overwhelming, and it’s natural to want to shout your love from the rooftops… but most people (thankfully) have enough self-control not to do it. It’s one thing being part of a happy couple and totally another to subject the world to your lack of boundaries. Are you guilty of these couple cliches?

  1. You make the world your bedroom. Holding hands or giving your significant other a quick peck on the lips when you’re having a romantic dinner out is one thing, but it’s a whole other ballgame if you’re having full-on makeout sessions, complete with butt grabbing and way too much tongue. Spare the world your lack of self-restraint and save it for home.
  2. You tag each other in every single Facebook status. You’re in the same house – can’t you just speak to each other face to face? Your Facebook friends don’t particularly care that Jason Smith picked you up some McDonald’s on his way home or that texts from Mark Williams totally make you smile (insert six heart emjoi here). Thank God the hide button exists.
  3. You stop speaking for yourself. What do you like to do on the weekends? “Well, we usually like to get brunch on Sunday mornings and then we catch up on Netflix and make dinner together.” What’s your favorite food? “We really like pizza, of course, but lately we’ve been really into Korean BBQ.” Either you have multiple personalities or a serious problem with boundaries. Yikes.
  4. You post sad Instagram selfies when you’re apart. Yeah, we get it – you’re #missinghim and #soinlove, but no one cares. Being apart for 8 hours while one or the other of you is at work or for a weekend while you’re away visiting your parents is not the end of the world, and certainly doesn’t call for a 83 shots of you in his t-shirt that still #smellslikehim.
  5. You’re condescending towards your single friends. It’s great that you’ve found love and everything, but that doesn’t mean you know all there is to know when it comes to matters of the heart, and being a jerk towards your single friends is not cool.Finding someone to have sex and eat Chinese food with does not make you a love mentor, so lay off the patronizing.
  6. You’re constantly playing matchmaker. Since you’re in a couple now, you’re determined to make sure all your single friends get to experience even an ounce of the happiness you have (though they’ll never truly get it – your relationship is like nothing else, of course), so you’re always trying to find someone to set them up with. What you see as a good deed is actually really really annoying, so please stop.
  7. You stop spending time with anybody else. It’s natural to want to spend every waking second with your other half, especially when it’s all new and you’re still getting to know each other. The sex is hot, there are endless things to talk about and the rest of the world doesn’t matter. It’s fine for a week or two, but there are other people in your lives, you know. You’ll probably want them there when this whole thing blows up.
Piper Ryan is a NYC-based writer and matchmaker who works to bring millennials who are sick of dating apps and the bar scene together in an organic and efficient way. To date, she's paired up more than 120 couples, many of whom have gone on to get married. Her work has been highlighted in The New York Times, Time Out New York, The Cut, and many more.

In addition to runnnig her own business, Piper is passionate about charity work, advocating for vulnerable women and children in her local area and across the country. She is currently working on her first book, a non-fiction collection of stories focusing on female empowerment.