I Dated A Pothead & I Would Never Do That Again

When I first started dating my pothead ex, I thought he was the coolest guy I’ve ever met. He was super easygoing, so funny, and a blast to be around. Then I realized that his life pretty much revolved around weed and he was literally high 24/7, which got old pretty quickly. Here’s why I could never date a dude who blazes regularly again:

  1. The weed was always more important than me. If we were out and he needed another hit, you best believe that we’d cut our plans short so he could get home to his bong. It was always the first thing he did after he woke up, even before he’d roll over to say good morning to me. When I look back on our relationship, I can’t deny that he definitely loved Mary Jane more than me.
  2. I felt like I didn’t really know him because he was always high. I barely ever saw him when he wasn’t high, and when I did, I saw a huge difference. He would be super grumpy and impatient and get annoyed at every little thing I did. It was weird to think that I didn’t even know who my boyfriend really was without the veil of marijuana over his personality.
  3. He talked about it all the time. Our conversations always ended up being about pot in one way or another. Whether it’s the difference between vaping and smoking or the percentage of THC in Sativa strains, I tried to care in the beginning, but I eventually got really tired of hearing about the benefits of cannabinoids. Get a life, dude.
  4. I felt like he judged me for not being chill. The reason why I liked this guy was because he was so easygoing. He would say yes to everything I said, he wouldn’t care if I was late and always be down for whateverI loved his chill attitude at first, but it kinda made me think about how un-chill I actually was and I could tell he thought so too.
  5. He resented me for not needing to get high to calm down. One thing that I was surprised to know upon our breakup was that he was jealous that I didn’t “need” weed and thought I was therefore too good for him. He used marijuana to self-medicate and I didn’t think there was anything wrong with that, but obviously he did and he thought I looked down on him for it.
  6. He never had any money. I was always astonished that he never had any money even though he lived with his parents. I soon figured out that he was spending all of his money on weed and one of the reasons he wanted to break up was that he couldn’t “afford” me. I never asked him to buy me things, but he didn’t even have enough money to do normal dating activities like going out to eat, so it started to get annoying.
  7. He never felt like doing anything exciting. Stoners love to just sit and stare at the wall and that’s exactly what we did most of the time. If I wanted to do something that involved movement, he would never want to do it. He always just wanted to “veg out” and yeah, I sometimes did too, but it’s important to try new things as a couple. We only ever hung out at his place and got high. Not really my idea of fun.
  8. I always felt pressure to get high even though I didn’t want to. I’m not really a pot smoker. I only ever smoked at parties or when my friends would pressure me into it. Sometimes it’s fun for me, but sometimes I get paranoid from it, so I’m always really careful about how much I smoke and with who. My ex would always “suggest” that I take a toke or two even if I didn’t want to. I’d always do it anyway just to make him happy.
  9. He always smelled like weed. At first, I actually liked the smell, but then it started to get old. I didn’t want to always leave his house smelling like I swam in bong water. I swear the stench is still not out of my clothes.
  10. We always ran into problems because of it. Whether it’s him not being allowed into the bar because he had weed in his bag or not being able to go out for Valentine’s Day because he blew his last cash on an extra rare strain, our relationship was always being affected by his habit and I was getting pretty sick of it by the end of it. Ugh, never again.
Jennifer is a playwright, dancer, and theatre nerd living in the big city of Toronto, Canada. She studied Creative Writing at Concordia University and works as a lifestyle writer who focuses on Health, B2B, Tech, Psychology, Science, Food Trends and Millennial Life. She's also a coreographer, playwright, and lyricist, with choreography credits for McMaster University’s “Spring Awakening,” “Roxanne” for the Guelph Contemporary Dance Festival, and “The Beaver Den” for The LOT, among others.

You can see more of her work on her Contently page and follow her on Instagram @jenniferenchin.