No one plans to fall for someone who’s already taken, but that doesn’t mean going after them is a good idea. If you find yourself dating a married man, you might convince yourself that it’ll all work out like a fairytale in the end and that it’s not the worst possible romantic scenario you could find yourself in. However, here are a few home truths about being with someone who’s already committed to someone else.
- You’ll be the only one making compromises. Because he’s the one who’s in a committed relationship already, you should prepare yourself to be the one to make all the compromises. Your life will revolve around the married man and his schedule because he won’t be able (or willing) to rearrange his life for you. In the end, you’ll get exhausted having to bend over backward to make your relationship work—anyone would.
- He’ll probably never leave his wife for you. Regardless of what he promises you during/after sex, the chances of a married man uprooting his entire life and divorcing his wife to be with you are pretty slim. They become nearly nonexistent if they happen to have kids as well, so don’t believe it. Holding out hope that he’s going to leave his life behind to start a new one with you as his partner is a total waste of time and you’ll only end up disappointed.
- He wouldn’t hesitate to betray you in the same way he’s betraying his wife. Let’s say your married man does decide to leave his wife behind and get with you. What then? If you honestly think that he’ll be able to stay faithful to you and that your relationship will be solid, you’re kidding yourself. If he cheated once, he’ll do it again, and you’ll only have yourself to blame.
- You would be devastated if someone did this to you. I have to point out that you’re seriously breaking girl code by dating a married man. Think of how you would feel if your partner cheated on you with another woman. You’d be mad at him, of course, but you’d also be furious that this other woman could step in and ruin your relationship when she knows how much it hurts. Doing this to his wife is a pretty crappy thing to do, you know.
- You’re selling yourself short. By dating a man who’s already taken, you’re doing yourself a serious disservice. You deserve to be in a relationship with someone who can dedicate all of his love and attention on you rather than splitting it between two people. You deserve someone who only wants to be with you, not someone who thinks it’s cool to have his cake and eat it.
- You’re going to end up hurt. I don’t know what else needs to be said here, but connections like this rarely if ever end well. Eventually, he’ll end it. Either he’ll decide he can’t lie to his wife anymore or she’ll find out and their marriage will implode and he’ll blame you. Either way, there’s no happy ending to be had here.
