Dating Is Depressing AF When You Genuinely Want To Find Love

If you’re dating because you truly want to find love with a great guy you can build a future with, you probably end up disappointed a lot of the time. Finding someone that you click with and who wants the same thing in life as you do might seem like a simple enough request, but it often feels almost possible to fulfill. Because of this, dating can feel downright depressing AF and borders on soul-destroying. Here’s why:

  1. You date with complete honesty but are often blindsided by BS. You know what you want — you want love, and yet you’ve been met with countless losers who only tell you what you want to hear or lie about who they are just to get what they want from you. It’s hard to know what you can trust anymore because you’re so used to being led on and taken advantage of by losers.
  2. When you make a kind gesture, it’s sometimes seen as needy or clingy. Whenever you date anyone, you probably do it honestly, thoughtfully and with good intentions, just as anyone should. If you text a guy first, get him a random and spontaneous (not to mention thoughtful) gift or show your affection for him, it sucks when he gets turned off or sees you as clingy or needy. WTF?
  3. You believe you can trust guys, but more and more they prove you wrong. You try and trust every new guy you encounter and give him the benefit of the doubt, but it’s just so damn hard when history has shown you that many guys are only out for themselves and couldn’t give less of a crap about your feelings at all. Just once, you’d like to meet someone whose loyalty and honesty is equal to your own. It’s not too much to ask, and yet, it can feel like it totally is these days.
  4. Finding a guy who doesn’t just want a hook-up feels insanely difficult. It really does feel like more and more guys these days are opting for low-key, casual sexual relationships that require little to no effort as opposed to having lasting love with one person. You know that sex is only a small part of the equation and there are other amazing benefits to having a real relationship, and yet it seems like so few guys feel the same way anymore.
  5. Your real intentions scare a lot of guys off. A lot of the time, you don’t even get the chance to see what could potentially develop because your honesty about our intentions can scare guys off before you even get a chance. Why the hell does it seem like so many guys scared of commitment these days? When you actually tell a guy you’re looking for a real and meaningful relationship, many of them see it as instant pressure and run away almost immediately. You’re just being straight up. Ugh.
  6. If you give a guy girlfriend perks, he sometimes takes complete advantage of it and then goes MIA. When you’re dating someone and you truly like them, which is always (otherwise, why would we date them?), you tend to behave like you would in any relationship. You treat your partner with respect, generosity and thoughtfulness… only to sometimes be completely unappreciated for your efforts and tossed aside for the next flavor of the month. The best part is, a lot of the time, you don’t even get an explanation as to why he went rogue. It’s rude AF.
  7. You’re often left with unanswered questions from being ghosted. Do you know how exhausting it is when we have to question ourselves over and over again because yet another guy didn’t have the decency to give you a real and concrete ending to the relationship you were building? It’s absolutely infuriating, and yet it’s something you  just have to suck up and deal with because it seems like it’s not going to end anytime soon.
  8. You’ve heard every excuse in the book and you’re sick of the nonsense. From “I’m just not ready” to “I’m not looking for anything serious” and “I’m just too busy for a relationship,” you’ve probably heard literally every excuse as to why a guy can’t offer you what you’re truly looking for. It’s a painful reality, but you keep trying to find love despite it.
  9. You probably feel deflated a lot. Maybe you give up, take breaks and dive back in routinely, and the cycle is seriously so exhausting that it’s natural to find yourself wondering why the hell you even keep putting yourself out there and making the effort to begin with.
  10. More than likely, you literally don’t understand how you can still be single. How can it be this hard for good women to find love? How can so many amazing women with so much to offer get caught up in this BS we call modern dating? Why does it feel like so many guys these days so put off by relationships in favor of meaningless sex? It’s a cycle of questions that constantly spin through your mind, but there are no real answers.