If Dating Is Depressing You, Do These Things

Let’s face it: dating kinda sucks, and after dealing with one too many toxic guys, game players, liars, and losers, you might feel like quitting altogether. The important thing to remember is that you can find love without losing your mind in the process — here’s how:

  1. Don’t take it so seriously. It sounds easier said than done, but it’s good to try to see the lighter side of dating rather than letting it feel like something too dramatic and serious. After going on dates with the most ridiculous and irritating guys, think of it as funny stories to tell your friends over drinks on Friday night instead of a sign that you’re going to be forever alone. Who says being single is such a bad thing, anyway?
  2. Don’t stress out about texting rulesThere are so many ridiculous texting “rules” like not texting guys too soon after they text you or not texting him immediately after a first date. It’s all BS! Just because you follow the texting rules doesn’t mean you’re going to find the most amazing boyfriend, and why should you be so rigid in your approach to texting a guy you like? Go with the flow and do what’s right for you because that’s the only guarantee of having no regrets.
  3. Avoid the temptation of dating apps. The jerks that are on dating sites and apps can make you decide to stop dating forever. It’s also depressing to spend your Friday nights swiping left and right instead of getting out there and living your life. If you must join a dating app, then stick to one and don’t let it get in the way of you meeting people the good old fashioned way.
  4. Stick to your standards. In the crazy world of dating, your standards are your sanity. If you keep dropping yours to accommodate the guys you’re dating, you end up losing yourself. That’s what can make you feel crazy and it’s never worth it.
  5. Be clear about what you want. Speaking up about what you want out of dating isn’t weird — it’s what strong women do. A lot of the time, it’s hard to know if you’re actually dating the guy you’ve met for drinks a few times or if you guys are just hanging out. Being honest about what you’re looking for is a must so that you weed out the time-wasters.
  6. Don’t wallow after being ghosted. Ghosting happens to loads of people and it sucks every time. The thought of some guy disappearing on you without a word is maddening, but sometimes it happens without any warning signs. The only thing you can do is forget the loser as quickly as possible and realize that he’s the one with the problem, not you. Don’t waste your time thinking about what you could have done wrong or how sad you feel. It will just make you miss out on better guys out there who are man enough not to ghost.
  7. Stop talking to guys who send you penis pictures. Receiving unsolicited penis pictures is so weird and annoying. It’s even worse if you were really enjoying chatting to the guy who seemed like a catch. The best thing to do with penis pictures for your own sanity is to delete them and the guy who sent them. There’s no other way because it’s really tough to take a guy seriously and feel good about him after he’s sent you his junk mail.
  8. Take breaks every now and then. If you’re looking for Mr. Right, sometimes you need to slow down and take a break. Stop going on dates for a while to think about how to proceed and to show yourself that your life can be great even if you never meet your perfect match. Stop putting so much pressure on yourself to date a lot and meet guys. It’s really not the only way to have fun.
  9. Keep the hope alive. The best way to deal with the dating world is to see it for what it is. Yes, there are a lot of jerks out there who will try to con you and waste your time, but there’s also great stuff to experience and good men to meet. Even though you know about how crappy the dating world can be, don’t let it make you jaded.
  10. Don’t let social media rule your relationship. Everyone’s posting couple selfies on Instagram and showing off about how amazing their relationship is on Facebook. It’s easy to think that you and the guy you’re dating need to jump on this social media bandwagon to be normal, but what’s the payoff? Besides, just because you seem to be the perfect couple online, it doesn’t mean that you’re really happy. Instead, focus on being happy in real life where it actually matters.
  11. Don’t hook up right away. We’re living in the hookup culture where most people are just looking to score. Lots of emphasis is placed on sex, but jumping into bed with someone can make things really complicated. It’s bad enough wondering if he’ll call after you had coffee, but even worse after you saw each other naked. Keep sex off the table for a while to figure out a guy’s real intentions and prevent extra stress.
  12. Don’t settle — you’ve got options. One of the most mind-boggling things about modern dating is how everyone talks about how some guys like to keep their options open, and yet so many women settle for guys who are less than they deserve as though these men are the last ones on earth. They totally forget that they have options too! WTF? You have many options available to you, so don’t think you need to tie yourself to a loser. You’re so much better than that.
Jessica Blake is a writer who loves good books and good men, and realizes how difficult it is to find both.