Dating Hangover: How To Tell If You’re Burned Out On Love

There comes a point in everyone’s dating journey when it just feels like too much effort to try to meet someone. When an hour spent getting ready means the second you sit down at the bar, you know the person sitting across the table is not for you. When going to bed early sounds amazing compared to making small talk with a stranger. Sound familiar? There are a few signs that point to a dating hangover. And the cure is definitely the same so feel free to grab some greasy nachos and couch time.

  1. Your own company is better than awkward silences. There’s something freeing about enjoying spending time alone. You know that even if you’re single, you have a good relationship with yourself. Trying a new recipe for dinner or hanging out with a good book, you can keep yourself busy and happy.
  2. You no longer look forward to a Friday night date. If you wake up the morning of with a desperate urge to cancel, that’s a sure sign that you’re just not all that into the prospect of dating right now.
  3. You wonder if you will ever find someone. There’s no getting around the feeling of hopelessness that sets in after a string of bad dates.
  4. You’re over Tinder. You still believe in romance but don’t want to find love on a dating app. While all your friends have got Tinder dates lined up this weekend, you’re exhausted just thinking about scrolling through the endless guys. You even start questioning who your type is and who you find attractive.
  5. Dating feels so monotonous. When you have some bad luck, there’s a pattern that becomes obvious. You get all excited only to find the person not as attractive as you hoped you would, you find zero chemistry and/or the conversation sucks. Or you date someone for three dates or even a few months only to discover they don’t want a relationship (or you don’t want a relationship with them). It’s hard to get excited about dating again when this keeps happening.
  6. The spark is always missing. When you know what it feels like to really click with someone on all levels – physical, emotional, intellectual – it really sucks to realize that doesn’t happen with everyone. That spark just hasn’t been there with anyone you’ve gone out with recently and you’re just so over going on boring dates.
  7. You want to be happy, not frustrated. Nothing is worse than sitting at a restaurant on a Saturday night staring into your glass of red wine, wishing you were at home but unable to come up with a polite excuse for bailing. Dating can be frustrating, and you just want to enjoy your life.
  8. You’re still thinking about your ex/the last guy you dated. If you miss someone, then it makes sense that no new guy can measure up, at least not for now. Going on dates when you’re trying to get over someone can make you feel even lonelier than staying home alone.
  9. Your BFFs are happily single. We get influenced by the people in our lives, whether that’s a good thing or not. But in this case, it can be empowering to see strong women who are cool with flying solo. When your good friends are fed up with the dating scene, it’s easy to feel that way too.
  10. The idea of taking a dating hiatus sounds good. And finally, you definitely have a dating hangover if you feel excited about the idea of not going on dates for a while. The search for love or at least lust is supposed to be fun and bring you new experiences. If it doesn’t, don’t be afraid to admit it.
Aya Tsintziras is a freelance lifestyle writer and editor from Toronto, Canada. In addition to writing about dating and relationships for Bolde, she also writes about movies, TV, and video games for ScreenRant and GameRant. She has a Political Science degree from the University of Toronto and a Masters of Journalism from Ryerson University. You can find her on Twitter @ayatsintziras and on Instagram @aya.tsintziras.