Dating Only Sucks When It’s With The Wrong Person

All my life, dating was a struggle. I didn’t believe it was real attraction unless it involved drama, confusion, and games. Then I met someone wonderful and suddenly everything became so simple. Here’s why my perspective changed.

  1. There’s no drama in sightKeep it simple, stupid. I never understood that I could have happiness without initial struggle and conflict. It still blows my mind that the two of us interact so easily without any issues whatsoever. I honestly wasn’t sure it was possible.
  2. We don’t play any games. I had an impossible time finding someone straightforward in the past. I dated plenty of people who insisted that they were, only to realize it was the same old tired story in the end. It’s amazing how nice it is to be around someone who’s truly honest and upfront about how he feels.
  3. There is a sense of mutual acceptance. He literally takes me for exactly who I am, with no attempts at changing or manipulating me. Because of this, I’ve never felt so relaxed around a guy without some nagging feeling that he needs to be different in some way.
  4. We never question our connectionHe made it clear to me from the beginning that he thought I was special and that he wanted to spend time with me. That was a breath of fresh air to me, coming from a city where the dating atmosphere was beyond wretched. We know this is something real and neither of us take it for granted.
  5. It’s clear where we both stand. I’m still shocked at his complete willingness to express his feelings to me without any sense of insecurity or fear of rejection. His quiet confidence makes me feel like I can simply exist in my truth, knowing that he’s not going anywhere.
  6. There’s such ease between us. It’s almost freaky. I hardly know how to explain it. It’s not that we got comfortable too soon because I’ve definitely experienced that before as well. It’s more like we see each other so clearly that there’s no need to feel awkward about anything.
  7. We delight in simply being together. I’ve never dated someone so happy to spend time with me in any capacity. There’s no ulterior motive. We can sit and talk for hours and both of us are perfectly content with that. I worried that it would become all about the sex but it hasn’t.
  8. He’s proactive and so am I. He makes it abundantly clear that he wants to be around me, and I melt every time he takes initiative and makes plans. I became so discouraged with past partners that I stopped even trying. Now I’m newly inspired because I know the effort is mutual.
  9. We trust each other enough to be vulnerable. He’s a naturally lovely human being, and  because he’s so sweet, I feel completely at ease expressing how I feel. I know he won’t run away or judge me. There’s nothing so wonderful as a sense of safety and security with another person.
  10. It’s crazy how well we relate to each other. It sounds cheesy, but it already feels like I’ve known him forever. We say the same things at the same time. He draws belly laughs out of me with his wry sense of humor and brings tears to my eyes when he’s suddenly sweet. I love it.
  11. He appreciates my strength and independenceHe’s nothing like the string of guywho complained that I was intimidating. He confirmed what I suspected all along: finding a man who is secure in himself is the answer. I’ve craved an equal partner and he’s definitely someone who can match me.
  12. Being around him makes me calm. I used to think that I really liked a guy if I got nervous and weird around him. If I didn’t have anxiety, it wasn’t a true crush. Now I know better. When I’m with this guy, I feel peaceful and grounded and relaxed. He brings out the best in me.
  13. We have no problem discussing the issues that were a nightmare with everyone else. I cannot stress the importance of this difference enough. Every worry I have melts away as soon as the two of us begin speaking. He’s so communicative and accommodating—not an experience I’ve had with any other man.
  14. I finally believe in unicorns. I knew what I wanted but I wasn’t sure I’d ever find it. Now that I’ve met this lovely person, I have some hope again. He’s shown me that good men still exist in the world and that there are guys out there who will appreciate me and give me what I deserve. I could get definitely get used to dating this way.
A former actress who has always loved the art of the written word, Amy is excited to be here sharing her stories! She just completed her first novel, and is also a contributor for Elite Daily, Dirty & Thirty, and Thought Catalog. Amy is the founder of What If Journey and can be found on Twitter @amyhorton18. You can also visit her website at