How Dating Terrible Guys Because You’re Lonely Is Only Making It Worse

How Dating Terrible Guys Because You’re Lonely Is Only Making It Worse ©iStock/wundervisuals

Loneliness can lead you to make some pretty terrible decisions if you’re not careful. Not only can you fall for the first guy to give you attention, but you end up jumping into a relationship with him before you actually know if you’re compatible. If you’re lonely and you’re moving too fast, this is why you’re making it so much worse:

  1. Your confidence takes a nose dive. Going through a cycle of terrible guys just to fill a void is only going to shatter your self-worth in the process. Ultimately, the more you allow these guys into your world, the more you start believing that all guys are disappointments, the lower you set your standards, and the less you value yourself.
  2. You start believing all guys are terrible. The types of guys you find to fill the void of loneliness aren’t typically the guys you want hanging around you for the long run. If you’re looking for a quick fix, most likely they’re only looking for a fast and easy time. After settling for enough of these guys, you start to believe that every guy is going to be the same, and you’ll become paranoid when you do actually meet a good one.
  3. You end up in a cycle of loneliness. Feeling even lonelier when your relationship comes to a quick and messy end is super counterproductive to what you wanted to accomplish in the first place. Having to constantly start at square one with less and less confidence each time, only makes you feel even more lonely than when you started.
  4. You lose sight of what genuine compliments are. Let’s face it, the types of guys who are just there for a good time are only going to tell you what they think you want to hear. They’re awesome at sweet talking, but they suck at following through and being genuine. After all, how can they give you legitimate compliments when they don’t know anything about you, and they don’t try to get to know you, either?
  5. You settle for the first guy to come along… for better or worse. When your biggest priority is simply finding someone, you end up settling for anyone. If you’re constantly settling for the easiest solution, you’ll quickly lose sight of the type of guy you really deserve, and who you should be looking for in the long run. Remember that being single is so much better than being in a series of relationships that make you feel totally alone.
  6. They just distract you from being lonely; they don’t change it. At the end of the day, going from guy to guy, regardless of how crappy they are, only distracts you from your boredom and loneliness. You’re simply putting a band-aid on the problem instead of solving it. Instead of focusing on the first guy that comes along, join some groups, expand your circles, and wait for the one who will actually stick around.
  7. You start to crave the attention. When you constantly have guys telling you what you want to hear, you start to crave that kind of attention, even though deep down you know it’s not real. It becomes even more of a struggle to be alone because you feel even lonelier when you don’t have a guy lingering around.
  8. You’ll end up wasting more time. If you’re ultimate goal is to meet someone you can build a future with, you’re wasting a ton of time on these guys who are willing to jump right into a shaky relationship with you. Any guy worth your time will want to get to know you, and will want you to take the time to get to know him, too.