If You Ditch Your Friends For Your Boyfriend, You Really Are The Worst

You already know that you should never blow your girls off just because you’ve got a new boyfriend, so why is it so hard not to cancel a night out with your BFFs for a night in with him? Yes, it’s tempting to spend 24/7 with the guy in your life, but here’s why it’s a terrible idea (and makes you the absolute worst if you do it):

  1. You’re setting yourself up to fail. When you put all of your time and effort and energy into one person, you’re saying they’re the most important part of your world. Then they break up with you and you’re left with no one. Don’t set yourself up to fail. True success means having love and keeping your friendships intact too.
  2. You’re being selfish. Sure, you’re in your love bubble and having the time of your life, but what about your friends? They still need you just as much as they did before. They’re dealing with all sorts of crap from boy problems to crappy dates to work stress. They were there for you when you were sick of being single and meeting awful guys, but now you’re dipping out on them in their time of need? Not cool.
  3. You know better. By now, you’re old enough to know how to act like a real friend and a true person. You definitely know that becoming a crappy BFF just because you’ve got a boyfriend is the wrong way to go. You’re a grown woman who knows what it means to be a true friend, so you need to act like it.
  4. You would hate being treated like this. If your friend did this to you, you’d be the one complaining to the rest of your group about how awful she is. You shouldn’t be such a hypocrite. Your friends will understand the occasional disappearing act since they know you’re all loved up with your new guy, but if it gets to the point where they haven’t seen you in weeks because you refuse to leave his side, their patience will understandably wear thin.
  5. You don’t have a full life without them. If you really want to be happy, and you obviously do, then focusing on your BF alone and neglecting everything (and everyone) you loved in life before him is not the way to go. You need lots of people and things in your world, from a job that gives you purpose to friends that make life much more fun. If it’s just you and your new guy, you’re basically living half a life.
  6. You’re asking for a fight. Don’t be surprised if one of those friends tells you what they really think of your new behavior. You’re going to hear that you’re being a terrible friend and that you’re being unfair. If you don’t want to hear that (and who does?) then it might be a good idea to schedule a girls’ night out and stop being so ridiculous.
  7. You’re missing out on so much. Say goodbye to long chats about love and life. Say goodbye to laughing about silly memories and sharing the ins and outs of each other’s lives. All that stuff is totally over now that you’ve got such a one-track mind. You may think you have all that you need, but you don’t. Female companionship is irreplaceable, and you’re seriously missing out.
  8. You’re going to lose them. In the end, you might have found love, but that’s about all that you’re going to have in your life. Your friends will walk away and have no issues saying goodbye once they realize you actually ditched them for a guy. It’s super lame and not cool at all. Until you smarten up, you might look around and realize that you’re on your own.
Aya Tsintziras is a freelance lifestyle writer and editor from Toronto, Canada. In addition to writing about dating and relationships for Bolde, she also writes about movies, TV, and video games for ScreenRant and GameRant. She has a Political Science degree from the University of Toronto and a Masters of Journalism from Ryerson University. You can find her on Twitter @ayatsintziras and on Instagram @aya.tsintziras.