I Ditched My Friends For My Boyfriend And I Have No Regrets

In the early stages of a relationship, all you want to do is spend every waking hour either with your new love interest or thinking about him. The last thing you need, then, is for your friends to suddenly dish out a lecture on why you should be spending your time with them instead. I’m not ashamed to admit that I ditched my friends when I got together with my boyfriend. Here’s why I have no regrets:

  1. My boyfriend is my best friend. As much as I adore my friends, no one can make me smile like my boyfriend. I’ve singled him out from everyone else for a reason, and it’s because he’s the one person who makes me happiest. Spending time with him isn’t all about hooking up—it’s just like hanging out with my best friend.
  2. My free time is precious. I work full time and there just aren’t enough hours in the week to do everything I’d like. By the time I’ve done my chores, run errands, and made time to see my family, my free time is actually quite limited. It’s only natural that I’m going to want to spend most of that time with my boyfriend.
  3. “Chicks before d*cks.” Seriously, are we 12? When I was younger, I’d be super paranoid about pissing off my friends by spending too much time with my boyfriend. Now that I’m an adult, I actually find it laughable that anyone would still try and use this line—how old are we? The fact is that now I’m at a stage where my relationship will always come first. Friends who try and make me choose between the two are fighting a losing battle from the start.
  4. I’m not going to avoid my boyfriend for weeks on end just to please my friends. Juggling a career, a relationship, and a social life is demanding. To make a relationship work when we live separately, my boyfriend and I need to see each other at least every other weekend. Postponing spending time as a couple to please people whose weekends aren’t as full just isn’t fair.
  5. Hanging out with single friends isn’t that fun when you’re in a relationship. I’d be more inclined to make time for my friends if we had an amazing time when we hung out together. Thing is, it’s hard to join in with discussions about dating and meeting new people without sounding smug. When you’re in a relationship, your priorities shift and it’s hard to get excited about meeting tonnes of new people. My single friends don’t need me as a downer on their chat.
  6. I like being treated like the special one. I’m just going to admit it—I like feeling like I’m special. Hanging out with my friends, I know the evening would go a similar way whether I was there or not. It’s hard to get into meaningful conversations in large groups and everyone is trying to be centre of attention. With my boyfriend, it’s just me and him, and I love being treated like I’m the most important person in the room.
  7. I’d rather be cozying up than going out on the town. Being in a relationship ages you overnight. Getting all dressed up to go and impress random guys has no appeal to me, and I know that me being there will spoil the fun for all my single friends. With a cozy night in with my boyfriend calling me at the end of a long day, why would I choose to be anywhere else?
  8. My true friends know that I’ll always be there for them. I know it sounds like I’ve completely abandoned the friend-ship, but I will always be there in times of need. A true friendship isn’t measured by how often you see each other, but by whether or not you are there when you need each other. My true friends know that I have their back when they need me most, so I don’t feel like I need to factor them into my plans every evening.
  9. Friendships aren’t about keeping score. A good friend would never call you up on how much time you spend with your boyfriend. Friendships aren’t about one-upping each other, but being mutually supportive and there in times of need. Just as I’d be shocked if my boyfriend attempted to keep score in our relationship, I wouldn’t expect that treatment from a friend.
  10. When my friends are in relationships, I know they’ll do the same. My friends might tell me now that they would never behave the same way as me, but I know when they meet guys they’re interested in that they’ll suddenly want to spend all of their time with them. When you’re excited about someone, you don’t think about planning who you’re spending time with. When that happens, I’ll be happy for them because I know exactly how they feel.
Isobel is a freelance blogger and writer for hire specialising in content for millennials who haven't quite got it together yet (i.e. herself). When not glued to her laptop, she enjoys eating cheese, doing yoga and spending time with family and friends.