Your boyfriend might be nice, but is he emotionally supportive? A supportive partner makes you feel safe with yourself and your relationship. They help you take on life’s challenges and deal with everyone’s BS and negativity. Here’s how you know you’ve found one.
He challenges you. He doesn’t agree with everything you say, even if that leads to the occasional argument. If he thinks you’re wrong, he’ll tell you (in a respectful way, of course). That’s a sign of a supportive partner. He cares what you do, which is why he’s vocal. If he didn’t care, he’d never share his thoughts.
He doesn’t make you jealous. He doesn’t Snapchat his ex-girlfriend or get blackout drunk every weekend. He’s respectful, which means he avoids sketchy situations that might make you uncomfortable. That’s why you feel so safe in your relationship. You know he’s always thinking of your feelings first.
He’s not afraid to show emotion. Men don’t cry? That’s ridiculous. Men cry all the time, especially mature men who are in touch with their emotions. I’m not saying he has to cry to be a supportive partner, but he should be able to express himself without fear of judgment.
He doesn’t rely on empathy. He doesn’t just say, “Oh, sorry babe” when you’ve had a bad day. He tries to help and even provides advice (when the situation calls for it). He’s a supportive boyfriend because he makes you feel heard and listened to.
He’s proud of your success. He congratulates your accomplishments and means it. Your success makes him as excited—if not more so!—than you, which is why he matches your level of happiness every time you reach your goals.
He acknowledges your problems. He doesn’t ignore problems. Instead, he faces them head-on. If you two have a fight, he makes sure the issue is resolved quickly, even if that means staying up all night to talk. He’s a supportive partner because he’s present during the tough moments as well as the good ones.
He knows how to be quiet. Unlike so many guys out there, he’s not a bad listener. When you speak, he’s quiet. Why? Because he’s actively listening to you. What’s more supportive than that?!
He knows what you need. Do you need space when you’re upset? A nice dinner? A hug? Whatever it is, he gives it to you without you having to ask. He’s paid enough attention to know how to react when you’re unhappy so he always makes you feel better, not worse.
He’s willing to make sacrifices. Compromising is one thing, but making sacrifices is an entirely different kind of support. Does he put his plans on hold for you? Move his schedule around to make time for you? That’s a sign of a supportive partner. He’s willing to take the necessary risks.
He believes in your dreams. He’ll fight for your dreams even if they seem far-fetched. I’m not saying he’ll quit his job and move to LA so you can become an influencer, but he’ll pitch in where he can and make you feel like he’s equally invested.
He reminds you of his feelings. He doesn’t just tell you he loves you, he reminds you with small gestures. He brings you coffee in the morning, makes your dinner, and takes you to see movies he has zero interest in.
He doesn’t make all the decisions. Because that’s not what supportive partners do. Sure, he has an opinion, but he knows how to take the back seat. He lets you call the shots just as much as he does. In fact, he wouldn’t have it any other way.
He doesn’t discredit your conditions. Do you have depression or some type of phobia? Pretty much everyone does. What everyone doesn’t have? A boyfriend who doesn’t roll their eyes every time they mention their anxiety. He might not relate but he respects you enough to not be a toxic a-hole.
He puts your comfort first. He doesn’t put you in uncomfortable situations. He pays attention to what you like and what you don’t so you always feel taken care of. He wouldn’t take you to a bar if you hate drinking and he wouldn’t force you to eat barbeque if you’re a vegan.
He knows relationships are 50/50. You both put the same amount of energy into your relationship. He listens to you as much as you listen to him and he puts your comfort first as much as you put his comfort first. That’s a sign you’re both supportive partners.
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