Don’t Call Me A Tease Just Because I’m Not Into You

It wasn’t my intention to break your heart. In fact, I never even tried to get you to like me in the first place, so don’t hate on me for putting you in the dreaded “friend zone.” I’m not a tease just because I give you attention.

  1. Being nice isn’t the same as flirting. Making eye contact with you when I pass you in the hallway doesn’t mean that I’m dying to go out on a date with you. I’m sorry if my smiles and waves are confusing, but I’m just trying to be nice. I’m not trying to trick you into falling in love with me.
  2. Texting isn’t that big of a deal. Sending the first text out isn’t the same as asking you out on a date. If I liked you, then our relationship would consist of more than the occasional conversation over the phone. If I give you attention through text, but never actually see you face-to-face, then I’m not really giving you all that much attention at all.
  3. Not all attention is good attention. If I’m always yelling at you and criticizing the way you treat women, you shouldn’t assume that I secretly like you. I’m just super blunt about how much I dislike you. Not all publicity is good publicity, and not all attention is good attention, so don’t get yourself confused.
  4. I won’t ignore you. You might’ve liked some bitchy girls in the past who wouldn’t give you the time of day, but I’m not like that. If you text me, I’m going to text back and if you walk up to me and ask me a question, I’m going to answer it with a smile on my face. It doesn’t mean that I like you – I’m just a decent human being.
  5. I dress for myself. Don’t you dare tell me I’m being a tease, just because I left the house while showing skin. I love my body. I enjoy flaunting it around town, but I’m doing it for myself, and not for you.
  6. I’m more of a flirt. There’s a difference between being a flirt and being a tease. If I play around with you, but make it clear that I’m not interested in you, then I’m not being a tease. I’m being honest from the start.
  7. I treat women the same way. If I compliment my female friend’s shirt, she’ll thank me without wondering if I have a crush on her. So why would you think that the same compliment means that I’m flirting with you, just because you’re a man? Sometimes, a compliment is just a compliment.
  8. I believe in male friends. Call me crazy, but I think it’s possible for men and women to “just” be friends. But how am I supposed to maintain a friendship with you if you think that my attention means that I’m flirting? I’m just trying to keep in touch.
  9. I don’t play games. If I liked you, then you’d know it. You wouldn’t have to wonder how I felt. So if I haven’t made the first move yet, just assume that you aren’t the one that I want.
Holly Riordan is a writer from Long Island, New York who has authored several science fiction and horror books. A graduate of Stony Brook University, she has spent nearly a decade writing for publications including Thought Catalog, Huffington Post, Teen Vogue, and more. You can find her on Instagram @hollyrio and Twitter @hollyyrio.