Here’s Why I Don’t Care About Making My Relationship “Facebook Official”

To me, the whole ritual of making your relationship Facebook official is completely unnecessary and honestly, kind of cringe-worthy. Here’s why I’d be happy to keep my relationship status off the internet.

I’m not a teenager. When I was 16, actually landing a boyfriend was new and exciting because it came with a lot of new experiences. Now I’ve been on enough first dates, had plenty of first kisses, and I’d actually prefer to not rush into labeling a relationship. I have a lot more to worry about than my relationship status so changing it on Facebook doesn’t seem as monumental as it once did.

Anyone who matters already knows. My close friends and family aren’t going to be surprised by a sudden Facebook relationship announcement. If they haven’t met the guy already, they’ve at least heard me talk about him, so who am I really announcing the big news to? All the people from high school that I haven’t actually talked to in over 10 years?

I’m a private person. I’m not the type of person that likes to share every detail of my life (or any details for that matter) on social media. I’d prefer to experience things in the moment than meticulously document them for the internet. Of course I post things sometimes, but my relationship status will always be something I consider to be private. I don’t want my Facebook history to turn into a relationship resume for new people I meet to study.

It’s a little too braggy for me. I’m not judging anyone who loves posting about their relationship all the time, I’m just not comfortable with it personally. Everyone is different—some people like to share their relationship bliss with the world and others don’t. Maybe it’s a little superstitious of me, but I think the minute I announce how happy I am, that’s when it will all fall apart.

My relationship status isn’t that interesting. It’s not so much my relationship status simply existing on social media that bothers me so much as the feeling that I’m announcing it as if it’s a newsworthy event. My Facebook newsfeed is full of things I find useful like workout tips, recipe ideas, and actual world news. It feels weird to think about my relationship announcement disrupting someone’s newsfeed as if it’s some kind of breaking news.

Who am I trying to impress? Having a boyfriend shouldn’t really be considered an accomplishment. As lucky as I’d feel to find someone I want to be in relationship with, it isn’t something I’ve worked hard for or anything. If I wanted to impress people, I’d post about a new job or an exciting trip I saved up for, not the fact that I found a guy who wants to spend time with me.

I don’t care about being Instagram official either. I always see articles about celebrities making their suspected relationships “Instagram official.” I guess after denying and hiding a relationship for so long, once they finally post a picture as a couple, it’s a big deal. I’m not a celebrity so I don’t think anyone cares that much. I also don’t have Instagram, so there’s that.

I don’t want it to be common knowledge if we break up. Remember how I said I’m a private person? That goes double for when I’m going through a rough patch. I don’t need people to ask me if I’m doing OK on my Facebook wall. Going through the breakup in real life is hard enough, so having to update my status on Facebook just seems like an unnecessary twist of the knife that could have been easily avoided.

I don’t use Facebook that much anyway. Keeping my relationship status up to date on social media isn’t exactly a priority. I mostly use Facebook to follow brands I like, participate in discussions on fan pages I’ve liked, and keep up with the news. My actual page is pretty sparse so having my relationship status on there seems a little out of place.

Maybe it’s a tiny bit of commitment-phobe thing. I can admit it: I’m not the best at commitment. It kind of freaks me out a little (but I’m working on it). I don’t get super excited about letting everyone know I’m seeing someone because I tend to keep it to myself until it’s gotten pretty serious. I don’t want to be the girl who is changing her status every other week. And don’t even get me started on “It’s Complicated.”

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