Don’t Get Stuck In The Grey Area With Yet Another Guy — You’re Worth More Than Maybe

Almost relationships are pretty much the worst thing to happen to dating. You seriously think that this is it, you’re finally in love again with an amazing guy you can build a future with — and then bam, out of nowhere, you realize you were super wrong. It sucks being single sometimes and the companionship is nice, but don’t accept something half-assed.

  1. You’ve been there before, and it was miserable. When it comes to being an almost girlfriend, you can totally say been there, done that, bought the t-shirt — and you have the text messages to prove it. You don’t need to go backward and experience the same crap over and over again with a guy who’s too immature or too much of a player to commit. You can’t change the past, but you can change the future, so stop almost relationships before they even happen.
  2. You hate the person it turns you into. When you’re someone’s maybe instead of official girlfriend, you turn into someone you barely even recognize. There’s really nothing else to say about it. You feel bad about yourself, your insecurities are through the roof and you have no idea what to say, do, feel or think. You don’t need that crap in your life.
  3. You deserve something real. You’ve had a broken heart more times than you can count along with a whole lot of tiny disappointments and dashed hopes. You deserve something real and you shouldn’t accept anything less. Once you start treating yourself the way you want to be treated, you’re setting the stage for guys to respect you too.
  4. You’re wasting your time. When you let yourself fall into an almost relationship, even when you recognize the warning signs, you only have yourself to blame and you’re wasting your own time. No, this guy’s not going to change and suddenly and magically want to become your official boyfriend. He just won’t and there’s no sense in trying to convince yourself otherwise. Value your time and stop this bad habit.
  5. You want more, and that’s okay. You may think that something casual is okay right now because hey, you’re young and you’re still figuring out who you are and what you want out of life. However, if you’re honest with yourself, you know you want more. Deep down, you want it all really, from a successful career to a happy social life to a dreamy love story. That’s nothing to be ashamed of and definitely nothing to compromise on.
  6. You need to be confident in your own worth. When you’re someone’s maybe, you’re acting like that’s all you can be. You need to be way more confident because if you don’t believe that you’re worth more then no guy is ever going to. Believe in how awesome you are.
  7. You’re asking for heartbreak. Getting involved in a maybe relationship is the fastest and most surefire way to get totally heartbroken. You already know this, and yet you keep doing it. It should honestly end now unless you want to end up miserable and depressed.
  8. What you accept now sets the stage for your future. You may not know what’s going to happen to you, but if you let yourself be a maybe instead of a sure thing, you’re guaranteeing that nothing good is coming your way. You’re building your future right now and you should keep your eye on your goals. If you want to fall in love, then honor that and listen to yourself.
  9. You don’t have time to waste. You have an amazingly full life and you certainly don’t have time to date anyone that isn’t completely invested in building something real with you. You’ve got a career and a life and a schedule that’s not getting any less full, so if a guy is going to be in your life, he’d better be worth it and prepared to be in it 100%.
  10. You don’t want to keep making the same mistakes. You’ve dated the worst guys ever and managed to live to tell the (bad date) tale. You’ve done the work to feel confident and okay again. Don’t let all that work go just to put yourself in the same crappy position all over again. There’s no reason to do that to yourself.
  11. You need to be a girlfriend or nothing at all. If you can’t be someone’s actual GF, then you should stay single until you can. Don’t settle for anything other than that real title just because some guy is too immature to commit or doesn’t understand why he should be in a relationship. Those are all his issues, not yours.
  12. You’re so close — don’t give up now. You’ve loved and lost, you’ve broken your own heart, you’ve walked away from crappy situations and you’ve cried too many tears over too many jerks. You’re so close to finding love — a lot closer than you think, actually. Why would you throw that away to be someone’s maybe?
Aya Tsintziras is a freelance lifestyle writer and editor from Toronto, Canada. In addition to writing about dating and relationships for Bolde, she also writes about movies, TV, and video games for ScreenRant and GameRant. She has a Political Science degree from the University of Toronto and a Masters of Journalism from Ryerson University. You can find her on Twitter @ayatsintziras and on Instagram @aya.tsintziras.