They Sure Don’t Make Men Like They Used To – What’s A Girl To Do?

They Sure Don’t Make Men Like They Used To – What’s A Girl To Do? ©iStock/Squaredpixels

Oh, the good old days. That’s how I imagine them, at least. The days when men actually made an effort, took girls on dates, and didn’t expect to get in our pants immediately. Where have all the decent guys gone? Here are the reasons today’s men are practically undateable:

  1. They have no manners. I know I’m a strong and independent woman but I still want a man to open the door for me, be considerate, and treat me well. There’s a huge difference between misogyny and common decency. Figure it out, and stop using feminism as your excuse to be a jerk.
  2. They are always looking for something better. The age of social media has totally destroyed romance. Why stick with one girl when there are hundreds of other viable options at your fingertips? Men don’t have to choose anymore, and they don’t like it much when a girl like me demands the attention I deserve. I refuse to date someone who only wants to mess around until someone he likes more shows up. No thanks.
  3. Traditional dating is practically dead. Gone are the days when men asked women out, took us on dates, got to know us, and made moves slowly. Now it’s all about chatting online and texting. If ever make it to actually meeting in person, it’s not a date, it’s “hanging out”. Then it’s all about how fast they can get a girl to sleep with them. It’s absolutely repulsive.
  4. They think “women’s rights” mean “she’s going to support my lazy ass”! Yes, I can pay my own way. That doesn’t mean I want a shiftless, unmotivated dude using me as a sugar mama. First of all, I ain’t got that kind of money. Secondly, I have self-respect. Those kinds of guys should go find some. Way too many men these days are perfectly comfortable riding along on the hard-won earnings of their ladies. Guess what? As soon as he finds someone with more cash flow, he’ll be out the door. I wouldn’t give a man like that the time of day.
  5. There’s no ambition – in life or in relationships. My generation seems so lost sometimes. The men especially have no idea what they’re doing or what they want. There’s no vision! I want a guy like me – not necessarily well off, but someone curious and seeking who wants to develop his talents, see the world, and experience life to the fullest. It’s the drive that matters. Where are those men hiding?
  6. Today’s men are passive as hell. They wait for us to do all the work – and we oblige them. I’m particularly guilty of that, and trying to stop. I get impatient that no one’s making the first move, so I do. That sets a precedent for a pattern I don’t like one little bit. I don’t expect a guy to do all the heavy lifting, but I do expect him to make an effort and show interest. If all a guy wants is sex and he doesn’t even try to know me, he can GTF away from me.
  7. These guys are taking even longer to grow up. Men have always lagged a little as far as maturity goes, but now they’re taking longer to figure everything out. I’ve been working through all my issues. Why would I waste my time on someone who isn’t where I am and who might never get there? I could always hope that he’ll change and grow, but there are no guarantees. It’s never worked all that well for me in the past.
  8. It’s a world full of lost boys. I might have had a terrible savior complex in my younger years, but I’m done with all that. I don’t want to support your ass, financially, mentally, or emotionally. It’s one thing to be an equal partner and quite another to be a mommy. I’ll be there for a guy, but I refuse to be a doormat. What happened to the grown-up, mature, stable men with vision and drive? I don’t understand. I’ve never met so many aimless, searching, confused and insecure men as I have in the last ten years. It’s the most depressing dating pool ever.
A former actress who has always loved the art of the written word, Amy is excited to be here sharing her stories! She just completed her first novel, and is also a contributor for Elite Daily, Dirty & Thirty, and Thought Catalog. Amy is the founder of What If Journey and can be found on Twitter @amyhorton18. You can also visit her website at