I Don’t Need Anything Big & Dramatic From A Guy — Just These Simple Things

Those roses and chocolates are sweet and all, but do they really matter in the grand scheme of things? There’s nothing wrong with romance, but if you’re holding out for grand gestures as a sign of his love, you need to change your perspective. After all, wouldn’t you rather your guy skipped the candlelit dinners and did one (or all) of these 13 things instead?

Giving you a gift that only he could know you’d love.

Unless you’re a big fan of flowers, getting a default bouquet once a month can start to feel a little boring and unthoughtful. Instead, he can win you over by getting you a little gift that only he would know you’d love, whether that’s a weird set of salt and pepper shakers he saw in the thrift store window or some new hair ties since he knows you’re always breaking them. It shows he can be thoughtful, and that’s romantic as hell.

Asking how your day went and actually caring about the answer.

 When you catch up at the end of a long day, the conversation should consist of more than a few grunts about what you want for dinner while staring at your phones. If he asks you how your day was and then listens and cares about the answer, that’s sweet as hell. Swoon!

Communicating when he has a problem instead of making you guess.

 Even the best relationship is going to have its problems every now and then, and you need to be with a guy who can communicate effectively when they happen. A guy who has the skills and enough care for the relationship to speak up when something’s not quite right so that you can work through it together is a keeper, for sure.

Making sure you always have an orgasm, no matter how long it takes.

Is there a trail of rose petals leading through the house, leading to a soft pile of them on the bed? That’s romantic, but it doesn’t mean crap if he isn’t willing to please you. A guy who knows that you won’t have an orgasm just because he’s put on some music and thrusted a few times is good news. Even better news is when he puts in the work to make sure you have an orgasm, no matter how long it takes. If your past boyfriends weren’t doing this, it’s clear you’ve been dating the wrong guys.

Calling when you’re away (instead of texting).

Even if your guy is a poet, texts just aren’t enough when you’re spending a week or more apart. He can send you a hundred texts about how much he misses you, but texts seem half-assed, no matter how thoughtful they actually are. A guy who actually picks up the phone to call you just because he wants to hear your voice and knows you want to hear his. Ugh, isn’t that the best?

Being okay just chilling.

 Celebrations and fancy dates are nice and all, but they’re definitely not the norm, and the longer you’re together, the less frequent they’ll likely be. You’re cool with that, but is he? A guy who’s happy just hanging out on the couch with you, ordering a pizza and binging the latest Netflix show is basically your dream dude, so hang onto him.

Worrying about your health.

When you get sick and have to cancel your plans, he runs right over with soup and basically every cold/flu medication he could find at Walgreen’s. He doesn’t stay long since he knows you prefer to be alone when you don’t feel well, but he makes sure to tell you that he’s just a phone call away and is happy to come over anytime, and you know he means it. He even drives you to the doctor’s office when you finally decide you’ve had enough and need a sick note for work.

Kissing your forehead. 

There’s no kiss quite like a forehead kiss, is there? It feels romantic, yes, but it implies a kind of caring that you just don’t get from making out. Forehead kissing doesn’t feel like a prelude to getting into your pants, either. Instead, it feels like he’s ready to protect you from anything.

Showing up for the big stuff (and the little stuff).

It doesn’t matter that he hates musicals — he’s coming to your opening night to support you. The same goes for your important family events. You don’t like your aunt’s drunken monologues either, but she’s family. If it’s important to you, it’s important to him, and that’s basically the most romantic thing ever.

Presenting a united front with you.

The world doesn’t need to be privy to your personal disagreements. If you’re in public, especially in front of family, he doesn’t undercut you or disagree with you. If you had an argument five minutes before walking into a party, no one else would ever know it because you’re still a unit and the drama gets left at the door. He’s your partner, no matter how mad you are at each other at the moment.

Standing up for you.

 If someone starts a confrontation with you in public or says something negative in your presence or not, he doesn’t skip a beat in coming in to defend your honor. He doesn’t have to punch them out for you, but he does speak up and let people know that talking crap about you isn’t going to fly. He knows you can fight your own battles, but he’s still going to be there to stand up for you.

Giving you his full attention.

What the point of romantic evenings if he’s on his phone during them? Being on the phone in bed is even worse! Romance is only lovely if it bring you closer together, and you have to be paying attention to connect. A guy whose phone is nowhere in sight when you’re spending some QT together is a winner.

Doing things without being asked.

 Ultimately, the most romantic thing he can do is prove he’s thinking about you and wants to put effort into your relationship and into making your life easier, less stressful and a lot more fun. Doing so without you having to ask is an added bonus, for sure.

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