You Don’t Need To Be Ashamed If You Met Your Boyfriend On Tinder

These days, the question “How did you two meet?” is rarely answered with, “At a party/at work/from a mutual friend.” Instead, we don’t technically “meet” at all, but happen upon a mutual match on dating sites or apps, chat a bit and then finally meet up in person to see if there’s chemistry. More often than not, our potential dates come from Tinder, so it makes sense that some of those dates turn into long-term relationships. Yet there’s still some stigma attached to Tinder. Here’s why you shouldn’t be ashamed if you met your boyfriend on Tinder. You’re definitely not the only one.

  1. It’s not only a hook-up app. Tinder’s gotten a bad rap recently for being known as a place for easy hook-ups, and the recent Vanity Fair article definitely didn’t help matters. But there are people who use the app for actual dates and potential relationships, so that reputation isn’t entirely warranted. Sure, if you want something casual, you can get that, but you can also weed people out pretty quickly if you’re not into that.
  2. Everyone’s on it. Okay, maybe not everyone, but a good chunk of your friend circle is probably swiping left and right at least a few times a day. So it shouldn’t come as a surprise to anyone that if you’re single and looking for a relationship, and Tinder’s your primary source of potential dates, then you would eventually get a BF out of the deal.
  3. There are tons of success stories. We all have that friend who’s now engaged to someone she once chatted with on Tinder. Why can’t it be you, too? At the end of the day, the app works for some people and doesn’t work for others, which can be said of online dating in general.
  4. Love is always superficial at first. A friend of mine who is anti-Tinder said she doesn’t want guys judging her on her appearance. But that’s what we always do, right? If you met a guy in a more traditional, old-school setting like a bar or classroom, you would notice his looks first and his personality second. It’s just how we’re wired. So really, Tinder’s just a 2015 version of a bar. No harm there. Later, of course, you care about way more than his physical appearance, but at first glance (or first swipe) that’s all there is.
  5. Nobody meets in real life anymore. If you never meet anyone in person, you’re definitely not alone there. So why can’t you use an app? Using Tinder is a million times better than whining to everyone you know that you’re unhappily single.
  6. You took control of your love life. Putting yourself out there is a pretty bold move, especially when you’re tired after a long week and your couch is calling your name. You decided to be proactive about your romantic life instead of just waiting around for Prince Charming to show up, which you know would never happen anyway. It doesn’t matter if you decided to use Tinder or OkCupid or ask your BFF if she knows anyone awesome to set you up with (though if she did she’d probably be dating him).
  7. There are jerks and sweethearts everywhere. Guys on Tinder get a lot of flak for posting gym selfies, bragging about their love of travel, having typos, and complaining about girls in their bio. Super silly for sure, but that’s not every guy using the app. Generalizations are never a good idea. If you happen to met a sweet guy on Tinder who becomes your boyfriend, there’s nothing wrong with that. You’ve been dating long enough and met enough jerks in real life.
  8. You could have just as easily been set up. Ever notice how Tinder tells you if you have mutual Facebook friends with someone? If that’s the person you end up with, you could have been introduced by that person or met at a party. So it’s really not that nuts that you guys met on a dating app. It’s almost like you were bound to meet at some point, so in a way that’s fate, if you believe in that stuff.
  9. Your past relationships didn’t work out. If they did, you wouldn’t have a boyfriend you met on Tinder, right? It’s not like meeting guys in person worked out all that well for you because you still ended up in the same place – single and using a dating app. So relax and just be glad that you found someone cool.
  10. Your happiness matters more than people’s opinions. You know you shouldn’t care what anyone else thinks, and yet that’s definitely easier said than done. But if you’re happy and in love, who cares if you’re being judged for finding love on Tinder? They can have their judgment, you have your awesome boyfriend. It’s a pretty fair deal.
Aya Tsintziras is a freelance lifestyle writer and editor from Toronto, Canada. In addition to writing about dating and relationships for Bolde, she also writes about movies, TV, and video games for ScreenRant and GameRant. She has a Political Science degree from the University of Toronto and a Masters of Journalism from Ryerson University. You can find her on Twitter @ayatsintziras and on Instagram @aya.tsintziras.