Don’t Be So Scared Of Losing Your Independence That You Never Find Love

Sometimes you get so good at being single that a funny and weird thing happens: you kind of want to stay solo forever. Sure, finding love would be nice, but you’ve got your routine and happiness down and you’re killing every single day. There’s nothing wrong with being on your own, but if you do want to meet someone someday, there’s no reason to ruin your own chances. Here’s why you shouldn’t be so scared of losing your independence that you never find love:

This is your single phase. 

This isn’t supposed to last forever. You’re using your time wisely and focusing on work and friends and hobbies, but you’re not supposed to have this much free time to do whatever you want for the rest of your life. Everything changes and there are always different seasons in everyone’s life. When you’re finally in a relationship, you’ll see that the changes are a totally natural progression, not a horror story or a death sentence.

If you’re scared, he’s not the right one. 

This is kind of controversial because some people think that a bit of fear is good for you, but for the most part, if you meet a new guy and you’re freaking out about what you’re giving up then you don’t think that you’re gaining enough from this guy being in your life. If you really cared about him, you would see this as a total positive and would be super excited for the next step.

Good guys are hard to find. 

Make that pretty much impossible. It’s an unfortunate truth about dating but it never seems to be proven wrong, no matter how much time passes. If you finally meet an amazing guy, why would you reject him because you like being single? That literally makes no sense. Don’t settle for just anyone, of course, but you don’t need to miss out on someone amazing either.

You don’t have to change your entire life. 

No one said that having a boyfriend means quitting your job and doing absolutely nothing except sitting around waiting to hang out with him. That would be a pretty sad life and wouldn’t make much sense either. You can still keep your life mostly the way that it is — you’ll just be adding someone pretty awesome to the mix.

You’re totally in control. 

It’s not like some guy is going to walk into your life and control everything and you won’t have a single say. You’re still in the driver’s seat. You can always date someone and see where it goes and then tell them it’s not working out. You just might find that you can handle this after all and that there was no reason to freak out so much.

You’re going to get bored. 

Sure, today you’re totally fine with your Netflix evenings and 24/7 focus on building your career, and you don’t have to say goodbye to those things. But eventually, you’re going to get bored of being alone, and you’re going to wish that you had someone sitting by your side binge-watching with you.

You can choose carefully. 

Deciding who you’re going to truly open up to is pretty much the most important decision ever. If you meet a guy who doesn’t like how hard you work or who doesn’t support you in any way, you don’t have to stay with him. You can choose the exact kind of person that you want to spend your life with. You won’t feel like you’re losing because they will be a really good decision.

You’re being way too stubborn. 

Claiming you can’t let go of needing to watch Pretty Little Liars whenever you want is kind of silly and stubborn. You can still spend your time how you want when you have a BF. That’s just not enough of a reason to forgo finding love.

You don’t need to be afraid. 

When you date someone new and realize that, hey, they’re actually pretty amazing, you don’t need to be scared. Nothing bad is going to happen — in fact, it might end up being kind of amazing.

You’re going to regret it. 

You should never have any regrets, and yet that’s exactly what you’re going to have if you reject legit potential boyfriends because you don’t want to say goodbye to the way that your life is right now. If you open yourself up to love, your future self is going to honestly thank you.

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