When you start to feel a little crazy for someone new, your infatuation might start feeling a little like love. But that four-letter word is a big one, and you can do some serious damage if you start throwing it around before you ACTUALLY feel it. If you’re on the fence about saying the L-word, make sure you’ve had experienced these important things together first.
The oh-so-scary commitment talk
If you two aren’t exclusive, what the hell are you doing telling this guy that you love him? Trying to rush ahead to the romantic proclamation is just pure BS. Before you even consider telling him that he’s the one, you need to figure out if he’s “the one” for someone else, too. Otherwise, don’t be surprised if your heart ends up broken.
The first big argument
Arguments as healthy from time to time. It’s how couples air out their problems and get things off their chests. If you’re still in the “Everything is perfect!” phase, there’s no way you should be calling this “love” anytime soon. Have your first really awful argument, survive it, then we’ll talk.
The “who TF is she” phase
Jealousy is never en vogue. Still, it’s only natural that you’d feel a little envious when your new guy starts talking with a new (and undeniably attractive) female friend. You absolutely have to go through the jealousy phase so you can know how he feels about you. If you’re just one of many girls he’s dating, you might want to hold off on the L-word.
The awkward, weird sex
When you first get with a guy, it’s only natural that the sex will be fantastic. There’s something exciting about getting down and dirty with someone new, and for the first few weeks, that will usually be enough to get your juices flowing. Then, it’ll happen: you’ll have weird, awkward, unsatisfying sex. This is a milestone in itself. It’s how you deal with it and whether you discuss it or not that will determine whether you survive as a couple.
The all-too-real sex talk
Do you know what this guy likes in bed? I mean, do you really understand his darkest, dirtiest, kinkiest fantasies? If the answer is no, you’re not ready to call this thing “love” yet. You absolutely need to talk about what you want and expect in the bedroom. If you’re not honest enough to do that, something’s up.
Meeting his besties (and vice versa)
You really can judge a guy by his friends. Who he hangs out with on a day-to-day basis will have a serious impact on how he acts and thinks. If he’s best buds with a load of losers who don’t respect women, you can assume he’ll be the same way. At least a small part of him will agree with their BS.
The first weekend trip
The first time you go away together, things can get a little tense. This will test you as a couple. If you’ve never spent more than 24 hours together, you might find this a little hard, and this is where you might find out that you’re not meant to be. The arguments that come up when you travel together for the first time are by no means insignificant — they’ll reveal a lot about where your relationship is headed.
Attending a wedding together
How does your new guy feel about commitment? Heading to a wedding together will throw up a whole load of issues. Suddenly, you will find yourself chatting about marriage, love, and children. It’s a whole lot to handle. But hey, it’s healthy. These are things you need to know.
The “never going home” phase
Every new couple finally reaches this stage: the one when you only go back to your own home to get fresh underwear. The one where you end up practically living at the other person’s house, though neither of you has admitted it yet. This is when you find out whether you could actually live together in the future. If the answer is a big fat yes, maybe it’s time to drop that little word on the guy.
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