At This Point, I Don’t Even Want A Boyfriend—I Love Being On My Own

It seems like everyone around me is looking for love, but not me. I’m not lonely, I have no fear of the single life, and I’m not worried about my biological clock. I don’t need a boyfriend. In fact, I’m so much happier on my own. Here’s why:

  1. I can do want I want when I want. I don’t have someone that I constantly need to check in with. I don’t owe anyone the courtesy of telling them what I’m doing, where I’ll be, or who I’m with. I don’t need to endure things I hate just to make my nonexistent partner happy. I do whatever I want whenever I want and that’s what the freedom of the single life is all about.
  2. I make all of my own decisions. I can do that without needing to let a partner weigh in. I have complete control over my own destiny. My life is in my hands and nobody else’s. There’s no one even to hold my hand and that doesn’t scare me—it’s actually empowering. I’m not letting a man hold me back because no matter where life takes me, I’ll know that I chose every path all on my own.
  3. I’m busy AF as it is. I might be single but that doesn’t mean I don’t have a life. I’m not some sad girl sitting at home eating a full tub of ice cream every night while I cry about the fact that I don’t have a guy in my life. I’m not someone for the couples of the world to pity. My life isn’t boring and it isn’t lonely. There’s more to life than finding a man and that’s exactly why I’m too busy AF to dedicate any time to look for “true love.”
  4. My life is drama-free. Sometimes dating means putting up with or at least dealing with a lot of pointless BS. Men think women are all drama, but the male population does their fair share of making life complicated (to say the least). I don’t have to come home to petty fights or be irritated to the point of needing space. The only drama in my life currently comes from my TV and that’s exactly the way I like it.
  5. My anxiety levels have gone way down. When I had a love life to speak of, I was always worried about that love life. How did he really feel about me? Could I trust him? Would we really be together forever? I was constantly thinking about him, overanalyzing how he felt and if he was happy. When I’m single, though, the only person I have to really worry about is me and to be honest, that’s about all I can take.
  6. I can provide for myself. I’m a strong and independent woman who doesn’t need anyone to survive. Once upon a time, women may have needed men to bring home the bacon but not anymore. I make my own damn money and pay my own bills. I don’t need a man for his paycheck or anything else. I’m completely self-sufficient and it’s a dream come true. I might not have the safety net of a partner but I always have myself to fall back on.
  7. I’d rather be alone than with the wrong guy. Being alone isn’t wasting time but being with Mr. Wrong is. I like being single—I’m happy all on my own. Being with a guy who isn’t right for me would just drag me down. Being on my own lifts me up. I’ve dated plenty of Mr. Wrongs and all they ever really gave me was misery. Why would I want that back, especially when the single life is so much better?
  8. My life is all about me. I get to live for no one but myself. My life’s purpose isn’t to make some man happy—I have my own joy to worry about. I make choices based on my wants and my needs and no one else’s. This is the time in my life to be selfish in a good way. For once, this love story is going to be about me and no one else. I’m not the damsel in distress, I’m the heroine who gets to save herself.
  9. I’ll always have the support of my girls. Men may come and go throughout my life but my girlfriends have always been there. Through every up and down, I can always count on my friends to be by my side. Meeting the right guy might be amazing someday but no matter what, he’ll never replace my girls.
  10. I don’t need a man to be happy. Happiness comes from within. I see so many women looking for a boyfriend because they think that having a man in their life will finally bring them happiness, but it won’t. I’m happy even though I’m single. Why? Because my life is pretty amazing as-is.
Kelsey Dykstra is a freelance writer based in Huntington Beach, CA. She has a bachelor’s degree in Creative Writing from Grand Valley State University and been writing professionally since graduating in 2013. In addition to writing about love and relationships for Bolde and lifestyle topics for Love to Know, she also writes about payment security and small business solutions for PaymentCloud.

Originally from Michigan, this warm weather seeker relocated to the OC just last summer. Kelsey enjoys writing her own fictional pieces, reading a variety of young adult novels, binging on Netflix, and of course soaking up the sun.

You can find more about Kelsey on her LinkedIn profile or on Twitter @dykstrakelsey.