You’ve made it past the first few dates, and are entering into coupledom. Congratulations — she’s into you. Before you take it too easy, though, remember that this is a marathon, not a sprint. And this is just the beginning. You’re off to a good start, but the race isn’t over yet. Putting actual effort and romance into your relationship shouldn’t just stop as soon as you’re sure she’s interested. Here’s what you need to do if you want to seal the deal:
- Always. Text. Back. I don’t mean three hours later and I certainly don’t mean three days later. I mean NOW. If you see it, respond to it. Seriously, why is this so hard?
- Make small talk with her mom. If her mom calls while you’re over, ask to say hi (unless it’s after 10 pm or before 10 am — if it is, her mom really doesn’t want to know what you’re doing at her daughter’s place). Ask her what she’s cooking for dinner and act like you care.
- Buy presents for her pet. Picking up flowers from the supermarket before a big date? Stop by the pet aisle and buy some treats for her dog, too. She’ll think it’s sweet that you realize how much she loves her pet and thought of doing something extra.
- Kick up the communication a notch. If you were going to Facebook message, text. If you were going to text, email. If you were going to e-mail, call. Communication is key to creating those pleasant interactions that fill the spaces between dates, and if you take yours a step up she’ll feel closer to you.
- Surprise her. A routine can quickly become a rut. Tell her you’re going to your usual place and then surprise her by substituting a new and exciting night out doing something you’ve never tried before.
- Be nice to her friends (but not too nice). Make sure to remember their names and always make sure they never feel awkward when the two of you are together. But don’t pay them too much attention or be too buggy-touchy-feely, or her jealous side may start to come out.
- Show her that you’re OK breaking gender roles. Make her lunch to take to the office the next day. Tell her how much you love playing with your toddler nephew. And please, please, please, vacuum your damn apartment once in a while.
- But also show her that you’re comfortable doing the typical duties of a man. Cooking for us is nice, but frankly we also really value someone who can work with power tools, put together furniture, and lift heavy boxes.
- Show her extra love when she’s rocking the natural look. When she goes without makeup, lounges in sweats, or hasn’t washed her hair in longer than usual, let her know that she’s beautiful and sexy. You’ll help her feel comfortable in her own skin around you, and that’ll pay off in spades.
- Never miss an opportunity to tell her how you feel. Tell her you love her, early and often. Or better yet, show her.
If you can manage all of the above, you’re sure to hold on to her for a long time to come.