Empty Promises a Narcissist Will Make When You Try to Leave

Empty Promises a Narcissist Will Make When You Try to Leave

Narcissists are masters of manipulation, and when you try to leave, they don’t give up their control easily. Instead of letting go gracefully, they’ll say whatever it takes to keep you from walking away. But these promises are rarely, if ever, genuine. If you’re thinking about leaving, here are 15 common promises narcissists make—and why you shouldn’t believe them.

1. “I’ll Change, I Promise”

A couple's disagreement becomes a public affair as they walk through a crowded promenade

They’ll suddenly swear they’ll be different—more attentive, more loving, less volatile. It sounds good in the moment, but it’s usually just a ploy to keep you from leaving. Real change requires effort and self-awareness, and narcissists rarely follow through once they regain control.

2. “You’re Overreacting”

Narcissists love to minimize your concerns, making you feel like you’re being irrational. They’ll insist the situation isn’t as bad as you think, planting doubt in your mind. This tactic is designed to keep you second-guessing yourself and stuck in the cycle.

3. “Things Will Be Different This Time”

unhappy couple breakup fight love dating

They’ll tell you they’ve learned their lesson and that everything will improve if you just give them one more chance. Unfortunately, this promise rarely translates into real change. It’s a delay tactic to keep you from leaving while they return to their old ways.

4. “You’re the Only One I Need”

loving a narcissist

Narcissists will pour on the charm, suddenly claiming you’re the center of their world. They’ll try to make you feel special and irreplaceable, but it’s less about love and more about keeping you hooked. Their devotion often fades as soon as you’re back in their grasp.

5. “I Can’t Live Without You”

narcisissts

This manipulative line is meant to guilt you into staying. By making their happiness or survival seem dependent on you, they shift the responsibility onto your shoulders. It’s not love—it’s emotional blackmail, designed to trap you.

6. “Everyone Makes Mistakes”

beautiful couple close-angle pose for the camera

While this statement isn’t technically wrong, it’s often used by narcissists to excuse their behavior without taking accountability. They’ll say this to brush off serious issues, hoping you’ll overlook their actions and stay.

7. “I’ll Get Help”

signs of attraction

When cornered, they might promise to see a therapist or work on their issues. While this might seem like a step in the right direction, it’s often just a stalling tactic. Narcissists rarely follow through, as true self-improvement conflicts with their inflated ego.

8. “Nobody Will Love You Like I Do”

This line is meant to make you feel unworthy of finding love elsewhere. By convincing you that they’re your only option, they trap you in a cycle of self-doubt. The truth? Real love doesn’t come with manipulation or control.

9. “Let’s Start Fresh”

They’ll promise a clean slate, as if all the past issues can magically disappear. But without accountability or real change, “starting fresh” is just a way to sweep problems under the rug and keep you in the same toxic cycle.

10. “You’ll Regret This”

This is a threat disguised as a warning. They want to scare you into staying by making you doubt your ability to thrive without them. The reality is, the regret they’re predicting is more about losing their control than your actual happiness.

11. “Think About What You’ll Lose”

They’ll focus on the practical aspects—shared finances, a home, or social circles—as a way to keep you tethered. By emphasizing what you’ll lose, they distract you from what you stand to gain: freedom and peace of mind.

12. “I’ll Make It Up to You”

Unhappy cafeteria customer complaining about the environmental noise

Narcissists often dangle the promise of making amends as a way to stall your decision. They might plan grand gestures or offer temporary kindness, but it’s rarely sustainable. Once you stay, they revert back to their usual behavior.

13. “Everyone Else Agrees With Me”

revenge cheating

To isolate and control you, they’ll claim that friends, family, or colleagues are on their side. This tactic is meant to make you feel alone and unsupported, making it harder to walk away. The truth is, they’re often exaggerating or outright lying.

14. “You’re Making a Huge Mistake”

what ghosting someone says about you

This line is all about planting doubt. They’ll act as if leaving them will ruin your life, but the mistake isn’t leaving—it’s staying in a toxic situation. Don’t let fear of the unknown keep you from choosing your happiness.

15. “We Belong Together”

woman covering ears from snoring

They’ll pull out the soulmate card, claiming you’re destined to be together. While it might sound romantic, it’s often just another way to guilt you into staying. True love isn’t about control or manipulation—it’s about mutual respect and trust.

This content was created by a real person with the assistance of AI.

Georgia is a passionate story-teller and accomplished lifestyle journalist originally from Australia, now based in New York City. She writes lifestyle content for Bolde Media, publishers of Bolde, Star Candy and Earth Animals.