Everything Movies Taught You About Falling In Love Was A Lie

Everything Movies Taught You About Falling In Love Was A Lie ©iStock/Eva Katalin Kondoros

We like to think that we’re really smart, and if we are watching a movie, we obviously know it’s fake. But you’ve probably been suckered into a bad relationship at some point, because on some level, you want to believe what movies told you about love. We all do it at some point. So what exactly do they get wrong? Here are the 10 ways movies lied about falling in love.

  1. How you meet will be a cute story. Sorry, but sometimes “we met in class” is all you’re going to say when people ask how you got together. Movies love meet cutes because they’re, well, cute! And sometimes people try to make really impossible situations work because of the story. Don’t fall for it. It’s just one day out of hopefully many more together.
  2. It’ll be love at first sight… Some people are very attracted to each other after meeting, but love at first sight isn’t likely. You’ll probably have to date a while to truly understand your feelings about each other. And that’s completely okay!
  3. … Or you’ll dislike each other before you fall in love. You’ve Got Mail was so good because our two characters hated each other… except they actually loved each other and didn’t even know it! In real life, however, you should trust your instincts. Passion is something that fades in relationships. The friendship will hopefully outlast that.
  4. The good girl can change the bad boy. This big lie starts in childhood with fairy tales like Beauty and The Beast. Yes, people can change, but they change for themselves and because they’re ready. So refrain from making a guy your project.
  5. The friend becomes the lover in the end. Contrary to what movies tell you, all genders can be friends. Many real friendships get ruined from pressure because so many people believe this lie. If you only like a guy as a friend, don’t feel like you need to be any more than that.
  6. Getting into a big fight only means there will be an amazing reconciliation. We all know this part of the movie. The couple we’ve been waiting to get together is pulled apart, only to reconcile after the guy runs to the airport terminal to stop her from leaving. Many couples get into terrible fights, but don’t call it quits because they think this is the last one before their happy ending. Chances are, it won’t be.
  7. Making up after a fight should be done with grand gestures. Many women have cried happy tears because of these moments, so real relationships can be a letdown. Apologies are usually just “I’m sorry.” There’s no big speech, no engagement ring, not even a Hershey bar. But having to do all that after every fight isn’t that sustainable anyway, so keep your expectations low.
  8. A makeover will make him fall head over heels. There’s nothing like a good makeover sequence! But if you step back and think about it, it’s pretty messed up. Girl gets all dolled up for a guy who doesn’t have to change his looks one bit to win her affection? Many girls try to change their appearance, thinking it will get a guy they like to finally notice them. Do you want a guy to truly like you for you or your new haircut?
  9. The relationship will lead to marriage. Many movies end things this way, because what could be more final than marriage? In real life, not all relationships end this way, nor should they. When you start thinking about marriage, do it because you’re ready, not because the characters you ‘ship did it.
  10. There is such thing as happily ever after. Many think marriage is the happily ever after because the credits roll after the vows are exchanged. “Ever after” is many things in real life. It’s sad, it’s happy, it’s frustrating, it’s hopeful, and it’s challenging. Don’t assume it is all downhill from here. Relationships take work.
Nicole Weaver is a staff writer for YourTango and regularly contributes to Hollywood, The Bolde, and Proud2BMe. She is a lover of all things entertainment meaning she spends most of her nights in New York binge watching television shows. Follow her on Twitter at @nikkibernice.