My Ex Was The Wrong Guy For Me But I Still Really Miss Him

We were together for years, and when our relationship finally came to an end after a long period of disagreements and tears, it hurt like hell. But even though we weren’t destined to spend the rest of our lives together doesn’t mean I have any regrets about being with you. I wish we could’ve lasted longer, but since we didn’t, this is why I’m happy to have been able to love you at all:

I had fun with you.

We laughed and smiled and joked together so much, it felt like I was dating my best friend. Even though the good times we had together ended up not being enough to outweigh the bad ones, they made my life better during the time we spent together. I felt like a kid when I was by your side, and in today’s messed up world, that was truly a gift.

I learned what it felt like to be truly loved.

I’d experienced imitations of love in the past, but none of them compared to what I felt with you. You treated me right, sacrificed your own happiness for me, and never made me doubt that I was the only one for you. Love may not have been enough to keep us together, but now that I know what it should really feel like, I’ll never settle for anything less in the future.

You came into my life at the right time.

Maybe we weren’t soulmates, but the time we were together was definitely meant to be. At least for a while, you were exactly what I needed. Yes, that changed down the road, but why should I regret a relationship that was perfect for us both during the time that it happened?

You taught me how to fight the right way.

I have a temper, and it tends to come out full-force when I’m in an argument with someone I love. But when you and I fought, things were calmer. We were able to have rational discussions rather than blowing up on each other. Even though we fought with each other a lot more towards the end, I’m forever grateful for how you showed me to keep my head even when I disagree with someone.

We both grew up a lot together.

We were so young when we got together, even if we didn’t think so at the time. Still, we both matured as a result of our time together. I really think we helped each other grow more as people… and perhaps it was because of this that eventually, we started growing in separate directions. I could never look back on a relationship like that with disdain no matter how much it hurt when it ended.

I learned what not to tolerate. 

For all the amazing memories I have with you, there are also some that are… well, not so amazing. Neither of us are perfect, and some of the things you said and did while we were dating simply weren’t okay. I’m annoyed with myself for putting up with it as long as I did before putting my foot down, but even the times you made me cry or question my worth eventually helped make me stronger.

You helped me get through a lot of tough stuff.

Despite your faults, your strengths were pretty damn strong. Before you, I’d never met a man who was so eager to stay by my side even when things got rough. Through loss, illness, and whatever other lemons life threw my way, you were always patient with me, always knowing when it was best to listen and when it was best to speak. I got through all those painful times with your help, and I’ll never stop being thankful for that.

At least for a while, we were happy.

 So what if that happiness wasn’t meant to last forever? Life is incredibly short, and to be able to find someone who brings me the kind of joy that you did is a lucky thing indeed. It was so hard to end things with you, but I’d go through that pain all over again if I knew I’d experience that same happiness I felt when we were together.

We’ll both be better partners for whoever comes next. 

I know I’m not the only one who benefited from our relationship. I saw you change as time went on, too, and I know I had a pretty big hand in that. I will always care about you, and I want you to find happiness with someone else. Just as I know I’ll be a better girlfriend the next time I get rid of my single status, I really think the next girl you date will have an even better partner than I did.

My memories of you are good ones.

While not everything about our relationship was great, I can ultimately look back on it with a smile and know that being with you was a good decision. You’re definitely my ex for a reason (okay, a lot of reasons), but I know that if I were to go back in time knowing that things would’ve ended the same way, I still would’ve chosen to be with you.

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