Winter has finally come to an end for another year, and I’m sure I’m not alone when I say, “Thank f**k!” You’ve probably dropped your cuffing season relationship and are looking forward to better and brighter days, both literally and figuratively. While it was nice to be coupled up over the colder months, it’s time for a little levity. That’s right, it’s nearly time for fielding season, and it’s going to be so much fun.
Fielding season is all about keeping it fun and flirty
Whereas cuffing season focuses on trying to lock someone down while the weather’s cold — having a cuddle buddy to keep you warm comes in handy, okay?! — fielding season is about letting go. It’s all about exploring your options and seeing what’s out there. And, instead of immediately getting tied down, it values casual connections and a lighthearted approach to dating. The attitude here is that you can find a boyfriend any day. For now, it’s time to have fun.
Fielding season typically runs from late May to early September. That’s pretty perfect, especially considering summer romances are the best, anyway. It’s a period in which you to stop searching for “The One” (only for a little while, we promise!). Instead, search for a killer night out or a great lay. The options truly are endless, and this is the perfect time to explore every last one of them. Whatever catches your eye, go for it. Why not?
How to make the most of your summer flings
Because fielding season is a celebration of the temporary, it may require a change in approach and attitude. Here are a few tips for making the most of your summer flings. They don’t last forever, and that’s the beauty of them!
- Be clear in your communication. Just because you’re celebrating fielding season doesn’t necessarily mean your dates are, so be upfront. The most stand-up thing you can do is be real about what you’re looking for. If you’re taking time to enjoy casual connections, say that. Don’t lead anyone on or pretend you want something you definitely don’t to avoid any awkwardness. Respect yourself and them enough to be honest.
- Keep it light. This is a fling, not a relationship. You’re not going to marry this person, so your focus should be on keeping things lighthearted. You want to be around people you can laugh with. People who make you feel good and who know how to have a good time. Experience the joy that kind of relationship can offer!
- Don’t overstep your bounds. If you’re seeing someone casually, respect the boundaries of that. You’re not their girlfriend, so don’t try to be or act like you are. Texting 24/7 or being demanding of their time is not the move. Take a step back and recognize your place. (Oh, and hold them to the same standards, obviously.)
- Live in the moment. Sometimes we get so in our heads that we don’t truly live in the moment. The beauty of fielding season is that you’re not trying to build a future. There is no future, so there’s nothing to worry about. It’s all about the right now, the today. Once you shift your perspective in that way, everything gets better.
- Embrace your spontaneous side. This moment won’t last forever, so what’s stopping you from flying by the seat of your pants? There’s no excuse for getting stuck in a routine or being afraid to branch out. Be brave and be curious. You never know what might come of it.
- Don’t forget your safety. Casual sex is great, but make sure you’re doing it safely. Protect yourself by making sure you’re using some form of birth control to avoid unwanted pregnancies if you’re someone capable of conceiving. And, of course, use protection so you don’t end up with some nasty STDs.
- Don’t overthink it. Our tendencies are often to dissect and analyze every element of a conversation or interaction with someone we’re dating. And while that makes sense when you’re hoping this person might be your partner, it’s completely pointless and unnecessary during fielding season. Who cares if things end in a week? They weren’t meant to last much longer than that, anyway. Just go with the flow.
- Remember to have fun. That’s really what this is all about, at the end of the day: fun. After some of the awful sh*t you’ve been through in the dating world, you deserve it.