Florida Police Release Wanted Poster For Runaway Cow Missing Since January

Florida Police Release Wanted Poster For Runaway Cow Missing Since January @PPinesPD/Twitter

Florida police are on the hunt for a female cow that is “faster than it looks” and that has been on the run since escaping in January and have released a wanted poster in hopes of locating her more quickly. The female bovine, which is described as “brown with a white head,” has been seen wandering the area since January and now authorities want to bring her in.

  1. She’s just out there living her best life. The wanted poster released by the Pembroke Pines Police Department says the cow loves to jump fences and visit people’s pools. She tends to hang out around Sheridan Street and the I-75 and while she’s not considered dangerous, she does occasionally wander into the roads. In other words, this cow is doing what she wants, when she wants. Why does she have to be brought in?!
  2. The cow has charges to face. Florida doesn’t pull any punches when it comes to convicting criminals, and the runaway cow has charges to face once she’s eventually brought in. She could face several counts of “MOOving violations, UDDERing false checks and fleeing and eluding police.” Hilarious!
  3. She won’t be taken in by just anyone. As the PPPD revealed, neither local cow herders nor the police have been able to capture her since January despite their best efforts. They’re hoping the cow’s owner or someone else with more info might come forward so that they can get her home safely.
  4. There have been sightings, but so far, no dice. One person did reply to the police department’s tweet which showed the wanted poster, saying she was sure she saw the cow on Saturday, March 7 but when she returned to the place she believed she’d spotted the animal, it was nowhere to be seen and she thought she was going crazy.
  5. As long as she’s safe, she should remain free! Maybe the cow doesn’t belong to anyone and she’s simply a law unto herself! While there are obviously dangers if she were to walk into a crowded highway or something, I sort of hope she remains to evade the police forever! Roam the length and width of Florida, precious animal!
Piper Ryan is a NYC-based writer and matchmaker who works to bring millennials who are sick of dating apps and the bar scene together in an organic and efficient way. To date, she's paired up more than 120 couples, many of whom have gone on to get married. Her work has been highlighted in The New York Times, Time Out New York, The Cut, and many more.

In addition to runnnig her own business, Piper is passionate about charity work, advocating for vulnerable women and children in her local area and across the country. She is currently working on her first book, a non-fiction collection of stories focusing on female empowerment.