Being immersed in dating culture is tough, but it’s even tougher when you’re genuinely looking for love. Between all the jerks out there and the struggle of finding someone you actually like, it’s easy to give up hope when you start to feel extra unlucky in love. But if you follow these ten dating commandments, you might end up with the guy of your dreams sooner than you think:
- Thou shalt not lie about intentions. You need to be honest about what you’re looking for even if you think it’ll scare a guy off. With modern dating culture being as it is and hookup culture on the rise, being clear about what you want will help you weed out bad potential partners sooner than later. You deserve better than to settle for someone who wants less commitment than you do.
- Thou shalt not go on a date you can’t afford yourself. Chivalry still exists, but let’s face it: it’s 2016, and going Dutch is a perfectly acceptable practice in modern dating culture. Plus, you’re a strong and capable woman, and you’re not going out with a guy so he can pay the dinner bill, right? If you’re serious about finding love from a place of strength, never accept a date offer unless you can afford to pay your own share. You’re looking for real love, not a sugar daddy.
- Thou shalt not ask for penis pics. Asking for a picture of a guy’s penis early on is just asking for trouble. He’ll instantly get the wrong idea about you and think what’s happening between you two is purely sexual. If you want to build a relationship with someone based on who you both are as people, leave sex talk out of the equation until you truly get to know each other. If he’s just looking to get laid, he’ll make that pretty clear on his own, making it easy for you to leave him behind.
- Thou shalt not give up your own values for a guy. Even if you’re looking for love, you still need to keep your own life in order. Making sure you keep your own responsibilities and goals in check is crucial. You want to find love, but you also want to stay true to yourself so don’t let your own life fall away from you just because a seemingly great guy shows up. If he’s truly worth it, he’ll appreciate that you have a life outside of him.
- Thou shalt show appreciation for kindness. If a guy does something kind for you, it’s important that you let him know. This works both ways, too: if he’s not respecting your kindness, move on without him. When you have a genuinely good guy who’s treating you well, don’t take it for granted — he’s one of the rare ones.
- Thou shalt call out the BS that you observe. Just because you’re looking for love doesn’t mean that you need to put up with crappy behavior. In fact, the exact opposite is true. If a guy’s making you feel like you’re less than you are, stick up for yourself and call him out. You want a guy who truly gives a crap about you, not some jerk who doesn’t realize how lucky he is to have you.
- Thou shalt not settle for almost-relationships. Don’t let yourself fall into relationship gray areas or be on anyone’s bench when you want to have the spotlight. You’re ready for the grand finale of love, so stop settling for being third-string.
- Thou shalt have other goals besides finding love. You should have other interests in your life other than dating. You’re a badass woman with a lot going for you, so rock it and utilize your talents. Whether it’s chasing a promotion, landing a new client at work, or finally climbing that metaphorical (or literal) mountain, having something else to aim for other than finding love will make you feel more fulfilled.
- Thou shalt not play games. You don’t need to calculate response times or hold your genuine feelings in a vault just because you’re dating. Real love should happen naturally between two people who are genuinely meant to be together. You don’t need games if he’s the right guy for you.
- Thou shalt always be yourself. You don’t have to fake anything with the guy who’s truly meant for you, so be who you are loudly and proudly. Be confident in who you are, and trust that no matter how many lousy guys made you feel bad about yourself in the past, you’re going to find someone who loves you flaws and all.
