My Friend Dropped Me For Her Boyfriend And Then He Dumped Her

One day she was one of my best friends, the next it was like we were strangers. She got a new boyfriend and after that, he was the only thing that mattered to her. If someone didn’t like him, they were dead to her. She dumped me for her boyfriend but I bet she never thought that he’d end up dumping her.

  1. He was a bad influence. I think she kind of liked the fact that he had a dark side. He was popular back in high school while she wasn’t, and even though it was YEARS later, I think she still wanted to be one of those girls “lucky” enough to date a popular guy. She thought his crazy life was edgy and maybe even cool. She wanted to change her reputation and he certainly did that—for the worse.
  2. She didn’t know how to make time for the other people in her life. If we were going to hang out, she wanted him to be there too. We could never just have girl time. Even if I brought my guy around, her disaster of a boyfriend was just a nuisance. He was completely immature and couldn’t carry on a conversation to save his life. Even worse, they were all over each other. Definitely not the type of couple anyone would want to hang out with.
  3. I wanted nothing to do with him. Honestly, he disgusted me. I still wanted her in my life no matter what but I didn’t want a guy like that hanging around me. She might have been willing to let him drag her down but I certainly wasn’t. He had a heavy record and I wasn’t going to risk the life I worked so hard to create for myself on some loser just because my friend turned a blind eye.
  4. He treated her like crap. She looked past his every flaw. He would be cruel with his words for days on end and then say one nice thing and she’d forget everything that came before. He didn’t make her a priority in his life and despite the fact that it ate away at her self-esteem, she just kept making excuses for him. It was like she wanted to be the girl that would change him so he could do anything to her and she’d stick by his side. No matter what he did, she was convinced he was “The One.”
  5. I told her he was bad news. I thought we had the type of relationship where we could always be open and honest with each other but in the end, our friendship wasn’t that great. If I was dating a total jerk, I’d want someone to tell me. I put myself in her shoes and treated her exactly the way I’d want to be treated, but that all backfired when I realized she wanted me to lie and pretend he was Mr. Perfect.
  6. He left her high and dry multiple times. After he up and left her out of the blue, you would’ve thought she’d learn her lesson but she didn’t. Instead, she took him back not once, not twice, but three times. He would pack her things and leave her to pay the bills all on her own and then she’d just take him back like nothing had ever happened. She kept thinking he’d be “different” this time, but he never was.
  7. She changed over the course of their relationship. To this day, I still miss my old friend but she’s just not the person she used to be and I don’t like the person she’s become. She used to be a nice girl but their relationship messed her up. The saddest part is, I don’t think she’ll ever find her way back to the girl she used to be.
  8. She’s too prideful to contact me. I think she just doesn’t want to admit that I was right about him. I’ll always care about her, so much so that I wish I’d been wrong about him so she wouldn’t have had to go through all of that pain. I told her where his life was going, what he’d do to her life, and ultimately that he’d break her heart. When all my predictions came true, instead of crawling back to me, she tried to retain some sense of pride by acting like it meant nothing to her when they were through.
  9. I don’t know if she’ll ever give up on him. She had never moved on from that on-again/off-again relationship and I think that if he showed up at her doorstep tomorrow, she’d definitely take him back. For some reason no matter what he does to her, she still loves him and believes he can change. I hope she someday breaks the pattern but at this rate, it looks like she’ll be hung up on him forever.
  10. She lost a damn good friend for a not so good boyfriend. We’d been friends for years, but she threw that all away to shack up with a total loser. I think she thought they’d end up happily ever after and the guy I thought wasn’t good enough for her would turn out to be her future husband, but he didn’t. Now she doesn’t have him and she definitely doesn’t have me. I wonder if it was worth it.
Kelsey Dykstra is a freelance writer based in Huntington Beach, CA. She has a bachelor’s degree in Creative Writing from Grand Valley State University and been writing professionally since graduating in 2013. In addition to writing about love and relationships for Bolde and lifestyle topics for Love to Know, she also writes about payment security and small business solutions for PaymentCloud.

Originally from Michigan, this warm weather seeker relocated to the OC just last summer. Kelsey enjoys writing her own fictional pieces, reading a variety of young adult novels, binging on Netflix, and of course soaking up the sun.

You can find more about Kelsey on her LinkedIn profile or on Twitter @dykstrakelsey.