Our society places a lot of emphasis on the importance of finding your soulmate. But what if this deep emotional connection didn’t have to be with someone you’re dating? Here’s how to recognize soulmate friends and why they can be just as important as romantic ones.
How to recognize a platonic soulmate
You feel an intense attachment to them. Professional intuitive Tanya Carroll Richardson tells mbg that “soul connections” aren’t inherently romantic in the first place. “A soul connection is when two people feel they are linked on a soul level in a significant or extraordinary way,” she explains. It’s as if “something much more brought you together or is at play.”
You understand one another on a different level. When you’re dealing with a soulmate of any kind, there’s an unspoken understanding between you that you simply don’t share with anyone else. “Your souls get each other,” says Annette Nuñez, M.S., Ph.D. “You recognize that soul from a past life, and there’s just a deep, effortless connection.”
It’s an incredibly satisfying relationship to have. While romantic soulmates can often end their relationship, when this type of connection is between people who are completely platonic, it can be a lifelong relationship. “Platonic soulmates are a very long-term, solid, trusting, and very satisfying relationship,” says clinical psychologist Meredith Fullers. “There are three things people want in a relationship: One, passion (which includes sex and lust); two, intimacy and three, commitment. It is the second two, intimacy and commitment that a platonic soulmate offers us.”
The importance of friend soulmates can’t be overstated. The importance of friend soulmates vs. romantic soulmates tends to divide a lot of people. Though some don’t agree that friends can be just as important as partners, if the friendship is of high quality, then they can be life-changing. Friend soulmates benefit your life in a plethora of ways. And often, friend soulmates are there for you in ways that romantic soulmates aren’t.
Why this type of connection is so important
Friend soulmates support you. Just like romantic soulmates, friend soulmates support you. They are there for you when you need cheering up, or when you need someone to have your back. No matter what you go through in life, they are there to help where they can and show their support. This kind of support can increase your sense of security and also boost your self-esteem. Why? You have someone there reminding you that you’re lovable.
They’re unfailingly honest with you. A platonic soulmate is important to have because they tell you what you need to hear. While a fake friend just tells you anything to please you and avoid confrontation, a platonic soulmate delivers the truth. It’s important to have someone like this in your life. After all, there are times when we all need a mirror held up to us. With a friend soulmate’s honesty, you can grow as a person.
They understand you implicitly. As mentioned above, friend soulmates understand you. You never have to pretend to be someone else around them because they get you for who you are. It’s important to have people like this in your life because having to put on a front all the time is draining. We all need the chance to unapologetically be ourselves so we can live our best lives. And friend soulmates make this happen.
They’re there for you when your heart is broken. Sometimes, romantic soulmates can break our hearts. That’s where friend soulmates come in. They’re there for you when your heart is broken. Friend soulmates are there to talk to and cheer you up when you are recovering from a breakup or even a fight with your significant other. That kind of support is irreplaceable.
There’s less of a need to impress your friend soulmate. One of the reasons why you might need a friend soulmate more than a romantic one is there tends to be less pressure to impress a friend soulmate. With passion taken out of the equation of your relationship, there’s no longer the need to meet expectations in this area. You can feel more relaxed knowing that you don’t have to impress.
Friend soulmates can last longer. Many people believe that we have a number of romantic soulmates—not just “the one”. If that’s the case, then you can still break up with your romantic soulmate. Even though you have a strong relationship and connection, you might not be able to make each other happy for whatever reason. In this way, friend soulmates can last longer. You can break up with a romantic soulmate, but it’s less likely that you’ll stop being friends with a platonic soulmate.
They’re there no matter your relationship status. Friend soulmates are there for you no matter your status. When you’re single, dating, in a relationship, married, or divorced, a platonic soulmate will remain a staple in your life. Whereas romantic soulmates can’t always be there because they’re extrinsically linked to your marital status. For example, if you break up with a romantic soulmate, they probably won’t be there for you during that period. And things may get awkward if you try to keep a close relationship with them when you’re dating or romantically involved with others.
Friendships take less work than romantic relationships. Though you still have to invest energy into a friendship, it usually takes less work to maintain one than to maintain a relationship. So with a platonic soulmate, you can reap the benefits of a soulmate without the time and energy that goes into a romantic relationship. When life is busy and you’re not in the headspace for a romantic relationship, platonic soulmates can be life-savers.
Strong friendships are crucial for happiness. While you can be happy without a romantic relationship, studies have shown that strong friendships are crucial for happiness. New research published in the journal Personal Relationships shows that having supportive friendships in old age was found to be a stronger predictor of wellbeing than having strong family connections. So no matter how much you love your romantic partner, never underestimate the power of a true platonic soulmate to boost your happiness.
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