Some guys like to jump straight to sex when you start fooling around—we can’t help it; it’s just how we’re wired. Of course, most women prefer a little foreplay to get you warmed up for the main event. If you want your guy to get on board with it, try doing these things.
- Wear something sexy. If you can a little bit of an effort to wear something sexy, it signals that you want things to be a little more romantic and intimate than usual. It can create a little mystery and excitement and hopefully get your guy to want to see you in it a little bit longer. This will make him want to keep touching you rather than going straight to sex.
- Make out in the car. If you have a date night planned, try making out in the car before you get home the way you may have early in the relationship. It also doesn’t hurt to flirt with him a little bit. This will help remind him of the early days of your relationship when he was hopefully trying to seduce you with plenty of foreplay before sleeping with you. If you can remind him of this feeling, it may help him be a little more into foreplay.
- Do a striptease. You don’t need to be an experienced dancer or even try to pretend to be a stripper to do this. Just shake your stuff a little and slowly undress in front of him. It’ll help to turn him on visually even though he’s not allowed to touch you. Soon enough, he’ll get so worked up that he won’t be able to resist touching and kissing you.
- Talk dirty to him. There’s a difference between the kind of dirty talk that works during sex and the kind you want to use before sex. Before you two get started doing anything physical, whisper a few things in his ear that will start to get him excited. Assuming you say the right things, he’ll want to keep it going for a little bit and won’t be so quick to skip foreplay.
- Take a shower together. Assuming this isn’t part of your regular routine, this can be a nice change-of-pace activity that can get him excited. Make sure you let him know beforehand that you don’t want to have sex in the shower. But that doesn’t mean you can’t fool around a little beforehand. Mixing it up like this in new and different places, even ones that are a little cliche, can be a good way to trick your boyfriend into slowing it down a little bit.
- Give him a massage. Granted, this isn’t going to do much for you, but it can be a good way to slowly turn a guy on. It can begin as a fairly innocent activity that you gradually turn into a sexual one. Unless you’re somehow terrible at it, he’ll enjoy it and perhaps feel like he owes you a little bit. It’s also a good way to remind him how good it can feel to take your time and go slowly rather than being so quick to get to the good stuff.
- Let your tongue loose. If he’s unwilling to kiss your body up and down and all around, try showing him how it’s done. Not enough women are willing to do some of the dirty work to get foreplay started. This doesn’t mean going down on him right away (not that there’s anything wrong with that), but by kissing and licking him, he’ll start to get turned on and may want to return the favor.
- Get your hands involved. This is another good way to show him how it’s done. Start off by moving your hands around some non-erogenous zones. Once he starts to get a little excited, you can slowly start to move your hands down. However, you don’t want to get to his groin area too fast. Remember, you’re trying to show him that it’s fine to take your time with foreplay.
- Try some roleplay. If you’re struggling to get your boyfriend to get into foreplay, you may need to turn him into another person, at least temporarily. Do some roleplaying where you pretend to be someone who needs to be seduced before jumping into bed. He’ll think you’re just being a little kinky, so he’ll be into it. Of course, what you’re really doing is tricking him into some extended foreplay, which he’ll enjoy because you’re trying something new and exciting. Hey, whatever works.
- Do it yourself. If all else fails, you may just have to take care of all the foreplay yourself. If doing a striptease wasn’t enough for him, perhaps watching you take off all your clothes and touch yourself will do the trick. He’d have to be a fool not to enjoy watching that. Perhaps more importantly, he may learn a thing or two about how you like it—and maybe next time he’ll give it to you.
