Should You Get Him A Christmas Present? 9 Signs You’re Not That Serious Yet

With Christmas just around the corner, it’s normal to be overcome with holiday spirit, especially if you’re dating someone new that you’re super excited about. You’re wondering whether you should go out and buy him a gift or if it might be a little premature. Well, if you notice any of these signs, maybe hold off this year.

  1. You’ve known each other for less than a month. This one is pretty straightforward. If you’ve literally gone on a couple of dates and have known each other a matter of weeks, you’re not in Christmas present giving territory (and you shouldn’t be). If things work out and you’re meant to be, there’ll be another opportunity to blow his mind with your amazing gift-buying prowess.
  2. You haven’t slept over at his place yet. Sleeping over at a guy’s place isn’t exactly the most intimate thing you could do, but it does signal a certain level of comfortability that moves beyond the casual. It means he’s cool with you being in his space and seeing how he lives. If that hasn’t happened yet, a Christmas present might be a little out of place.
  3. You aren’t exactly Facebook official. Again, if you’re kinda sorta dating and acting like boyfriend and girlfriend maybe but aren’t totally, 100% sure where you stand, buying him something for Christmas probably isn’t a wise move. Sure, he might accept it graciously, but it might also make things a little awkward.
  4. His Tinder profile is still active. Like the last point, a guy who hasn’t yet committed to you will probably find it a little weird if you’re buying him a Christmas present like he’s your boyfriend. If he’s still chatting to or even actively dating other girls, save your holiday spirit for someone who’s worth it.
  5. He gets weirdly non-commital when you ask him about his holiday plans. Either he plans to ghost you around Christmas or he really wants to make sure you’re not getting any grand ideas about this being your first Christmas together. Or maybe he does really like you but he’s not into the holiday and doesn’t want to make a big thing of it. Either way, no presents please.
  6. He’s mentioned how dire his financial situation is. Of course you don’t give gifts to receive them in the return, but if you know the dude you’re seeing is broke and you go out and buy him stuff, whether it’s a new razor or the new video game system, it’s going to make things unnecessarily uncomfortable. He’ll feel bad that he can’t afford to return the gesture, a little bit pissed off that you didn’t pick up his hints about being broke, and you’ll probably feel subconsciously resentful that he didn’t return the gesture even though the reason is totally legit. Just don’t go there.
  7. You don’t know his favorite movie, sports team, or band. If you can’t answer what are pretty basic questions about the guy you’re dating, you’re still in a super casual phase of your relationship and nowhere near gift giving territory. Leave it.
  8. You aren’t spending New Year’s Eve together. This might sound weird but hear me out. If you’re in a real relationship or even heading towards one, it makes sense that you’d be spending the New Year together. Unless one of you is out of town or working or something weird, if you’re not together on December 31 to kiss at midnight, you definitely shouldn’t be buying him anything for December 25.
  9. He’s straight up told you not to get him anything. Enough said. Dudes don’t generally pull the reverse psychology BS here. If he’s telling you he doesn’t want you to buy him anything and you do anyway, the awkwardness that ensues is all on you.
Jennifer Still is a writer and editor with more than 10 years of experience. The managing editor of Bolde, she has bylines in Vanity Fair, Business Insider, The New York Times, Glamour, Bon Appetit, and many more. You can follow her on Twitter @jenniferlstill
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