Getting Mixed Signals From The Guy You Like Is Pure Torture

Getting mixed signals from your crush can drive any woman insane. If you’ve experienced these things while trying to figure out if the guy you like is into you or over you, don’t worry — you’re anything but alone:

  1. It feels like high school all over again. You feel like you’re living your junior year in high school all over again, and it’s honestly the equivalent of a nightmare. You thought that he was into you, but now he’s acting like he doesn’t even know your name. You are *this close* to asking your friend to talk to him for you… but who are you kidding? You’re not a teenager anymore.
  2. You start obsessing over your looks. Red lips in the middle of the day is your new uniform. Who knows when you’ll be in the same room together? You just can’t afford to not be looking your best every time he’s around you.
  3. You think about him for at least an hour before you go to bed. Once you get into bed, you can’t sleep. Instead, you find yourself dreaming up all the ways it’s going to happen between you two… all while obsessing over how he might also hate you. Red wine is the only thing that gives you the rest you deserve.
  4. Your days are ridden with anxietyAnytime you see him or someone who looks like him, or even when you’re somewhere he might be, you go on high alert. You just care way too much about what he thinks of you, and you hate it.
  5. You’re stuck in purgatory and it sucks. That feeling of not knowing is worse than words can even describe. You’re in that phase of crushing on someone where you would totally be ready to go full relationship mode with them, but not knowing whether they feel the same is like your own personal version of hell.
  6. You consider just straight-up asking him out. You start to get the crazy idea that maybe he’s sending you mixed signals because he’s shy, and you consider just directly asking him out. The problem is, it would hurt twice as bad if he said no because of how invested you are in the whole thing, so you end up just leaving it alone.
  7. You feel like you did something wrong. You start going through all the times you could have offended him or seemed unattractive and turned him off. Was it that time you got sloppy drunk at that party? Or maybe it was when you told him that slightly offensive joke. In the end though, you can’t control your crazy and are slowly realizing that it’s not your fault.
  8. You don’t know how to talk to him anymore. When he talks to you, your mind is going a mile a minute, which makes you stutter and second-guess everything you say to him. It’s not your fault he’s put you through an emotional rollercoaster, even though he probably has no idea what he’s done to you.
  9. You’ve never felt more like the awkward turtle that you are. This uncertain “love affair”— if you can even call it that — has turned you into a more socially awkward version of yourself. You’re walking around with these “what ifs” running through your head, making it seriously hard to think you’re worth anything anymore. But you know you’ll get over it in time.
  10. You can’t shut up about him to your friends. Your friends are at the point where they start rolling their eyes even if you mention his name. At first they thought it was kinda fun and they loved the drama of it all, but now they’ve stopped caring and can’t even hear one more word about your issues.
  11. You consider dropping the idea of him all together. You think to yourself: “If he doesn’t like me anymore, then I don’t like him”. Easier said than done.
Jennifer is a playwright, dancer, and theatre nerd living in the big city of Toronto, Canada. She studied Creative Writing at Concordia University and works as a lifestyle writer who focuses on Health, B2B, Tech, Psychology, Science, Food Trends and Millennial Life. She's also a coreographer, playwright, and lyricist, with choreography credits for McMaster University’s “Spring Awakening,” “Roxanne” for the Guelph Contemporary Dance Festival, and “The Beaver Den” for The LOT, among others.

You can see more of her work on her Contently page and follow her on Instagram @jenniferenchin.