What Girls Who’ve Been Hurt Need From A Relationship

What Girls Who’ve Been Hurt Need From A Relationship ©Mapodile

Being hurt when you’ve invested your heart in the name of love truly sucks, but we’ve all been there. It’s hard to move past the sadness and feel hopeful that another opportunity of real and lasting love exists in our future. The pain we’ve experienced from being heartbroken changes us in many ways, and what we need from our new relationships going forward changes, too.

  1. We need understanding. We need someone who understands we’ve been hurt, and that we carry skeletons in our emotional closets that we’re not necessarily proud of. Being hurt when you were once in love isn’t an easy thing to move on from. It isn’t as easy as telling us to “get over it” like some people choose to believe. We need someone who gets that we might be going into things with a more delicate heart.
  2. We need patience. It won’t be easy at first. We’ll be apprehensive and cautious about a lot of things because we’re trying to make sure we’re in a safe territory with you. It’s hard for us not to think about the past when we’re forging a new future because we want to avoid the very things that led us to get our broken hearts before. Please be patient with us. We promise we’re worth it if you just stick around long enough to break past our initial fears.
  3. We need honesty. Honesty is the most important thing in any relationship, but for us, it’s absolutely necessary if we’re ever going to allow ourselves to be open and honest with you in return. We’re the women who have been ghosted, who weren’t given the courtesy of closure, and who gave everything and got nothing in return. Please be honest with us every step of the way, even if it means saying goodbye.
  4. We need affection. We need to feel genuinely cared about and we need assurances sometimes that you’re still into us. No, this isn’t needy and it doesn’t mean we lack confidence. We’re believe in ourselves, but when someone else comes along and wants to date us, we need to know we’re not wasting our time and that our feelings are reciprocated. Plus, being upfront about your feelings is never something to shy away from in any relationship.
  5. We need loyalty. We might have a past that’s hindered our abilities to trust, so loyalty is something we insist upon firmly. We need someone we can trust with our hearts and someone who will allow us to feel safe being vulnerable. It’s when you show us that you truly care for us that we’ll start to really fall for you.
  6. We need appreciation. When we make genuine effort to treat you with kindness and generosity, we want to know that you appreciate it, because it’s likely we’ve been taken for granted many times. In all honesty, appreciation is something a lot of relationships lack, and we know this from experience. But it’s because of our pasts that we appreciate more in the present, so we’ll always reciprocate this gesture.
  7. We need to give love. Our hearts have been broken and we’ve picked up as many pieces as we can. We won’t be perfect, but we won’t stop trying to iron out the wrinkles our hearts have yet to smooth over. With the right understanding and patience, we know we’re capable of the love we desire and the right person for us will fight the good fight with us, knowing the reward is a warrior who’s ready to love with all her heart.