Are You Good In Bed? 10 Things The Best Lovers Do Differently

You might think being good in bed is an entirely subjective thing, and while it’s true that everyone has their own likes and dislikes between the sheets, there are a few universal things that can make you one of those rare stand-outs that guys will remember. No, it has nothing to do with how big your boobs are or whether you’re meticulously hair-free at all times. The best lovers are pros at these 10 things:

  1. They’re not afraid to speak up. Good sex is all about communication and that goes double for women. Guys can’t read minds, and it’s true that what works perfectly on one girl won’t have any affect whatsoever on the next. The most reliable way to have great sex is to be able to put what you want into words. The best lovers talk about what they want because they know if they don’t, they probably won’t be getting it.
  2. They’re open to new things. Not many people would be satisfied having missionary style sex every day for the rest of their lives. Cosmopolitan has been printing sex tips including positions, toys and new techniques since the 1960s, and they’re still going strong — that means there’s no shortage of new things to try and no reason to ever get bored in bed.
  3. They’re confident in themselves. It’s pretty hard to get wild in bed if all you can think about is what your stomach looks like when you’re on top and how your butt jiggles when you’re doing it doggy style. Guys like girls who are confident and proud of their body. It may be easier said that done sometimes, but it’s the perfect example of a time you should just fake it til you make it.
  4. They genuinely love every minute of it. One of the number one complaints guys have about women who are boring in bed is that they’re starfish. They lie back and expect the guy to do all the work, and while they’ll grudgingly give oral sex if it’s a special occasion, they certainly aren’t enjoying it. And guess what? It shows. Being good in bed means they’re actually having a great time and they don’t care who knows it.
  5. They can be spontaneous. Women who are good in bed take opportunities to do something different because they like to keep things interesting. They don’t need to have a well-planned out evening where everything goes exactly how they expect it to, right down to the which positions they do and in what order. Sometimes the best sex is unplanned, but that’s what makes it fun.
  6. They make the first move. Making the first move means a woman is confident and unashamed of that fact that she wants and enjoys sex. There isn’t a guy in the world who doesn’t like a girl who knows what she wants and isn’t afraid to go after it.
  7. They can laugh things off. Two naked people exchanging bodily fluids can get weird. Unexpected sounds and smells are bound to happen, but it doesn’t have to be the mortifying experience you expect it to be. So you fell off the bed when you tried to transition to reverse cowgirl. So what? The girls who are great in bed can have a good laugh and then get right back down to business.
  8. They’re never selfish. Being able to make another person orgasm is pretty much a prerequisite to being good in bed. That means putting their own needs aside sometimes and focusing entirely on someones else’s pleasure. That doesn’t mean they don’t still get what they want — they just make sure the person they’re with is happy first.
  9. They know what they like. Through plenty of experimenting and never being afraid to try something new, people who are good in bed have figured out what they like and what works for them. Sounds simple, but there are still plenty of people who have no idea what they like in bed, so how could they possible know what anyone else likes?
  10. They make their partner feel irresistible. Everyone likes to feel wanted, and that’s exactly what people who are good in bed do for their partners. It’s not all about being good at oral sex or trying every position known to man. Sometimes it’s just being able to stroke your partner’s ego in exactly the right way.
By day, Courtney is a digital marketing copywriter living in Toronto, Canada. By night, she's a freelance lifestyle writer who, in addition to, contributes regularly to, IN Magazine, and SheBlogs Canada. Want to chat about relationships, Stephen King or your favorite true crime podcast/documentary/book? She's on Twitter @courtooo.