You Got Me Excited For A Future That Never Came

You always talked about the future we’d share, which only made me drop my guard and fall for you harder. It felt amazing to finally hear someone who seemed so committed to seeing things through with me, and in those moments, I was the happiest girl in the world. Then suddenly, you no longer wanted me in your life. It came out of nowhere and I still don’t understand what happened. You got me excited for a future that never came — screw you.

You let me get my hopes up.

I hung on to every word you said because at the time, I had no reason not to trust your honesty. I like to give people the benefit of the doubt and assume they’re being truthful when they express their intentions with me, so I believed you were being genuine. I felt like such a idiot when one day out of nowhere, you changed your mind. Your exciting words went to broken promises in the blink of an eye.

Why would you talk out of your ass when you didn’t mean a single word?

I’ll never understand why you said the things that you did if you had no real intention of seeing them through. If you doubted us even a little bit, I would have rather been spared the daydream. The fact that you put an idea in my head of a future that would never arrive makes the loss of you from my life much harder to shake.

It’s completely unfair to lead me on the way you did.

I’m not exactly sure what you were thinking at the time, but looking back, it’s clear you were being completely selfish. You merely painted the picture of what you wanted for yourself and your own future —that future isn’t with me. The next time you cast someone into your fantasy role, make sure you don’t break her the same way you broke me. Make sure you actually mean what you say.

I was really looking forward to living those plans with you.

Everything you said sounded so wonderful and it made the connection I felt to you even stronger, but I guess I’m naive. When we sat down and talked about the places we would see, things we would do and new memories we would make on our journey, I thought my search was finally over. I thought you were the guy I had been waiting for all along. It turns out it was complete BS. I was a fool.

It took me a while to make sense of our fallout.

When you flipped the switch the way that you did, it really blew my mind. What about our plans? What about the things you told me? What did it all mean? It meant something to me but clearly it meant nothing to you — it made me feel like crap. I questioned myself and my own vulnerability before I finally zoned in one the only thing that mattered: you’re a piece of crap liar.

I believed you, and you let me down.

I truly believed you wouldn’t hurt me this way. The only thing worse than being dumped is being dumped by someone who you have to erase not only from your past, but from the future, as well. Since you made promises you never kept, I had to re-imagine my future without you in it, and it wasn’t easy.

I felt like such a fool, but I know better now.

I know better now than to let someone fool me with “we” talk. I know that action is the only thing that will ever prove stronger than words. Because of you, I will no longer hang on to open-ended promises. It might be a bit harder for the right guy when he finally shows up, but at least I’ll know he truly gives a crap about me. I’m no longer looking for the guy who can talk — I’m looking for the guy that can follow through.

You’re the one missing out on a future with me that will never come.

The initial blow of your exit caught me completely off guard, and I’d be lying if I said it didn’t hurt me because it did. The only thing that matters is that I’ve had my chance to make peace with how stuff went down and I’ve come to the conclusion you’ve yet to feel. I want you to know, Mr. False Promises, that even though you changed your mind, I’m going to be better than okay. I’m going to move on without you and I’m going to completely thrive on my way.

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