If A Guy Does Any Of These Things, I’ll Marry Him On The Spot

Marriage isn’t something I take lightly—if I’m going to do it, I’ll only do it once, so it’s kinda a big decision. However, if I met a guy who does these 9 things, I’d say “I do” right there and then with 100% confidence that he’s the one for me.

1. He can hold his own with my family. I’m sure everyone thinks their family can be hard work at times, but I come from quite a conservative family and there are just some things that aren’t kosher. My family are very wholesome and loving but can equally be offended quite easily, so poking fun at someone is just a no-go. There’s also no swearing allowed, no talk of getting wasted, and certainly no crude movies being watched. Certain relatives will say things that could easily be misconstrued as euphemisms for rude things but it’s not acceptable to laugh and point it out. If a guy can roll with that naturally, I’m sold.
2. He tickles my feet every time I ask. I love a very specific type of foot tickle. In fact, I’d probably go so far as to say I’d choose it over an orgasm any day. It’s somewhere between a massage and a tickle, lightly tracing my skin with fingertips and nails and it sends such wonderful shivers down my spine and makes the hair on the back of my neck stand up. It’s such a small gesture but if a guy will do it, he’ll win me over immediately.
3. He can sleep with the TV on all night. It’s an awful habit, I know, but I simply have to sleep with the TV on every night. It’s an absolute deal breaker for me if a guy I’m dating is a light sleeper and needs total silence to sleep. It’s even worse if he has to wear earplugs. I know it’s not healthy and doesn’t promote quality sleep but I enjoy it too much to try and fix the issue so my guy has to love it too.
4. He’s willing to binge-watch a series with me no matter how late it gets. I get very involved in any series I choose to watch and I don’t get the same satisfaction if I have to wait a week to see the next episode. Last week, I watched both series of 13 Reasons Why over four days. That’s 26 episodes at about an hour each. You do the math!
5. He works really hard. There’s nothing that turns me on more than a guy who works hard—not the kind of guy who doesn’t have time for me because his job is all-consuming but the kind who’s passionate about his work and wants to give us the best life possible. It sounds really old-fashioned but I’d have no problem ensuring that a home-cooked meal and a glass of wine are ready on the table when he comes home from work every night if I know he’s working hard to build a future for us.
6. He doesn’t care that I’m a bit of a hermit. I have to admit, going out is fun and everything, but my ideal date honestly involves snuggling up on the couch in our pajamas, bringing in the duvet from the bed and watching a scary movie with a healthy dose of weed and snacks. If I wasn’t forced to leave the house for food and to walk the dog, I probably never would.
7. He always wants to go to bed at the same time as me. I have a thing about always going to bed at the same time as my partner. I can’t quite pinpoint why it’s so important to me, I just know it is. I’m happy to compromise if one of us wants to stay up later than the other and to meet in the middle somewhere as long as we ultimately end up with the same bedtime.
8. He’s a little soppy and doesn’t care one bit what his guy friends think. I can’t stand this hyper-masculine BS and this whole pretense of guys not letting their friends know that yes, they do in fact buy their girlfriend flowers and write her love letters because she’s the freaking love of their lives. He doesn’t need to share everything, but if a guy doesn’t care one bit what his friends will think about the soppy, romantic things he does for me, he’s a winner in my eyes.
9. He can accept that my dog will always come first, no matter what. Sounds like an easy one in theory, but in practice, this can be difficult. Yes, my dog will come first with basic things like his needs for walks and company over spending longer out with friends. But any guy I date will also have to get over the fact that when we’re having sex, my dog will probably start licking his toes and I’m not putting him outside in the hall, even if it’s just a quickie. If he keeps being distracted or put off by the licking, he’ll have to man up. I’m not going to have sex while my poor pup is crying his little eyes out behind a closed door because he doesn’t understand why he’s been left alone.