If you’re dating a guy who thinks he can get away with acting like an ass because you’ll never call him on it or hold him to any kind of standards, you need to GTFO of the relationship ASAP. If you want respect, you have to demand it and refuse to accept anything less — but if he’s doing any of these things with other girls, you’re not going to get it with him.
He flirts with other girls right in front of you. When you’re out with your boyfriend, how does he act with other women? If he’s obviously flirting with your friends or even strangers, that’s so messed up. Just because he’s doing it in plain sight doesn’t make it any less sleazy or more innocent. Stop deluding yourself by telling yourself it’s just his personality. Even if it is, it’s not a personality that makes a good boyfriend.
Or, worse, he does it behind your back. Your friends aren’t trying to BS you, you know. They’re not jealous of your relationship or purposely trying to upset you. When they tell you that they’ve seen your S.O. flirting with another girl, you need to take that seriously. If he’s creeping around trying to hit on other girls when you’re not there, that’s a major warning sign that he’s either a cheater, a jerk, or — most likely — both.
He messages the same girl all the damn time — and it’s not you. Um, hello, alarm bells! Is there one girl that your boyfriend just can’t stop chatting to? Maybe it’s his co-worker, his old college buddy, or his sister’s BFF — who it is doesn’t actually matter. If he’s pretty much obsessed with messaging the same lady 24/7, there’s probably a reason for that. Sure, he might not actually be jumping into bed with the girl, but if he’s building an emotional connection with her, you have to wonder why.
He dry humps other women on the dance floor. Ugh. You might think it’s “just dancing” but I call BS on that. If your guy thinks he’s Drake on the dance floor and grinds all over the ladies, he’s showing very little respect for you. Dry humping some poor girl is never a classy dance move, much less so if you’re resigned to watching from the corner. WTF is going on there?
He stalks another woman’s Instagram or Facebook pages. I’m not saying you should check his browser history, but here’s a serious red flag. If your guy is pining for another lady, he’ll want to illustrate that experience by checking out her pictures online. If he’s always stalking (and liking) some other girl’s photos, there might be more to it than meets the eye.
He buys other women drinks but always forgets yours. It’s not necessarily a problem when your guy buys another girl a drink. He might just be being friendly. If he’s buying a round, that makes total sense. Still, if he comes back from the bar with two glasses and one of them isn’t for you, you need to worry. Think about it: What is he trying to prove to this girl and what do his actions tell her?
He teases other women in an affectionate way. Unless he’s teasing his sister, this behavior is so not okay. The fact of the matter is that your boyfriend should not be teasing other girls like this. It’s a very subtle way of flirting without even flirting. He might say that it’s all just in the name of having fun and it’s harmless chit-chat but it’s really him disrespecting you. When you pick up on it, you seriously need to take off.
He talks crap about you to the other women in his life. When you’re in a relationship, you’re a team. It’s the two of you together, against the world. If your boyfriend has a problem with anything, he needs to talk to you about it. Bitching to other girls about how uptight you are or how low your sex drive is just tells them that you guys are pretty much over. Is he trying to tell these ladies that he’ll soon be single? Because maybe he’s right.
He tells them that you’re just ‘casual’. Oh, hell no. When you’re in a relationship, that’s it. End of story. If you hear your guy telling some girls that you guys are just casual, that’s out of line. Again, he’s basically telling them that he’s available when he’s not.
He sleeps with anyone who isn’t you. Finally, here’s the motherlode. Unless you guys are in an open relationship (if so, more power to you!), your guy should never, ever sleep with another girl. Ever. When girls get cheated on, they like to try and justify it to themselves or claim it’s no big deal, but it is. You know it is. This is the cardinal sin as far as relationships are concerned. Don’t ignore it — ditch him.
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