When A Guy Says These 10 Things, Your Relationship Is Not What You Think

Actions may speak louder than words, but that doesn’t mean you should just blow it off when your partner says something that sets off alarm bells in your head. If the guy you’re dating tells you any of these things, it might be time to figure out if this relationship is really worth continuing.

  1. I Don’t Think I’m Ready For A Commitment. If he has said this to you plain as day, but you’re still clinging to the hope that he may change his mind and fall head over heels in love with you, you’re kidding yourself. Odds are he isn’t going to change his mind on this. Thank him for his honesty and move on.
  2. I’m Between Jobs Right Now. Sometimes life happens and for one reason or other people find themselves unemployed. But if you find him constantly in this situation, with little care to finding or keeping a job once he has one, it’s time to reassess. If he can’t commit to his boss and financial future, what hope is there that he will commit to you?
  3. I Don’t Really Have Any Interests. Outside interests and passions keep us from getting bogged down with the mundane. If he’s telling you that he has no interests, he’s telling you he has no inner fire. A passionate, creative heart is one that’s open to life and all it has to offer, and if he doesn’t have that, it’s only a matter of time before the relationship fails.
  4. I Don’t Have To Meet Your Family, Do I? Said the man with no intention of committing to a relationship. If he’s not keen on getting to know your family and support network, he’s really not going to be interested in going beyond the superficial. Sure, have fun while it lasts, but don’t hang your hopes on anything long-lasting and serious.
  5. I Don’t Think I’m Really Cut Out To Have A Family. Even taking children out of the equation, at some point in the future, you’ll want to be able to refer to him as a part of your family. If he’s not into having a family around, how close do you think he’ll allow you to get before he decides he needs breathing space?
  6. I’ve Never Really Been In A Committed Relationship Before. If he’s a fresh-faced teen, this statement isn’t so bad, but if he’s in his mid-30s, it’s worth asking why he’s been single for so long. Is it possible Ms. Right just never came his way, or does he actively try to avoid commitment?
  7. My Relationships Have Always Failed Because Of My ExIf he has a scapegoat for every bad situation in his life, you can bet that at some point in the near future, you’ll become his biggest excuse. Owning your mistakes and not passing the buck at the first opportunity is a sign of good adulting skills — something he may be lacking in.
  8. I’m Still Deciding What I Want To Do With My Life. Not everybody has their path clearly laid out for them, and that’s okay. Not knowing exactly what it is you want to do in life isn’t that bad as long as you know the general direction you’re heading in. If you’re sitting on the sidelines watching him chase his tail, it’s time to take a step back before you find yourself getting dizzy.
  9. I Don’t Mind If You Want To See Other People, Too. Admittedly there are some out there who make this situation work for them, but if that’s not you, then speak up. There’s no other reason for him to say this other than that he plans on keeping his own options open. Going along with a situation because you think you can keep him on track is only going to end in your own heartbreak.
  10. My mom says she has to meet you first. There are two types of guys: independent men who make their own decisions and momma’s boys who have their decisions dictated to them. It’s all well and good for him to consult his mother on big decisions, but if you have to have her tick of approval before he’ll date you then there’s an issue. It might pay to remind him it’s his bed you’re climbing into, not hers.
Maggie is a freelance writer based in Perth, Western Australia. When she isn't swigging wine straight from the bottle, she is busy procrastinating on her housework. Currently working on her first novel, she is also the creator of The Reverse Housewife and regular contributor to Hub Garden.