Guys, You Can’t Have Your Cake & Eat It Too

The saying might be old, but the game is sadly still being played. You want a steady girl — a girl who’s committed only to you… and yet you refuse to commit to us. You won’t promise us exclusivity so that when you play the field, she can’t call you a cheater. You tell her to keep it casual while doing whatever you can to keep us on the hook. Screw that — you can’t have it both ways.

  1. You’re a hypocrite. Let’s just get this one out of the way. If it isn’t obvious to you, your playboy BS is completely hypocritical. You string girls along claiming you’re “just not ready for a relationship” while maintaining your single status but expecting us to be there whenever you snap your fingers. NOPE.
  2. Walk a mile in our shoes. How would you feel to just be one of many? Say you were dating a girl and you wanted to be with us and only us. We knew you were already devoted to us regardless of our status, but we say we’re not ready. Meanwhile, we keep seeing you and making you fall harder and harder for us, but every time we’re not with you, we’re with another guy. How would you feel then?
  3. What made you so emotionally detached? Did someone break your heart so now you’re trying to break ours? What you’re doing is cruel, so why don’t you care? You get just as close to us as we do to you, but you never fall for us — why is that? What made you this way? Are you a psychopath? Honestly, what the hell is wrong with you?
  4. Do you feel good about yourself? Sure, you’ve probably hooked up with your fair share of girls. You must love the attention you get from your boys who think you’re “the man,” but what happens when the party’s over and you’re alone with your thoughts? Do you feel good about the mark you’re leaving on this world? Because at the end of the day, what your boys think doesn’t matter and their approval doesn’t make you a good person.
  5. How do you sleep at night? Not only do we wonder how you live with your douchebag tendencies, but how do you have different girls in your bed night after night? Do you ever think about leading us on? Do you ever feel guilty for our heartache, or are you really the monster we think you are?
  6. Be a grown man. Go back to the title. See how it’s addressed? Specifically to guys, not men, because real men don’t treat women this way. There a millions of guys in this world, but you don’t have to be one of them. Be the exception. Be one in a million. Be a real man.
  7. Do you think this is a game? Hearts are on the line — how many have you broken with your carelessness? You’re trying to up your numbers by seeing how many chicks you can score, but we only care about one number — yours. You might not be taking this relationship seriously, but you know we are, so if you care about us at all, cut us loose from your team, because we’ll always lose with you we deserve to win.
  8. Grow up. This little game you’re playing is ridiculously immature. You want us to be with you and only you, but somehow you don’t lay out the same rules for yourself. It’s childish and selfish, and no woman deserves to be a pawn in your game. You’re not in high school anymore and your frat boy days are behind you, so quit your playboy antics and just grow the hell up already. One day, your BS will come back to bite you in the ass.
Kelsey Dykstra is a freelance writer based in Huntington Beach, CA. She has a bachelor’s degree in Creative Writing from Grand Valley State University and been writing professionally since graduating in 2013. In addition to writing about love and relationships for Bolde and lifestyle topics for Love to Know, she also writes about payment security and small business solutions for PaymentCloud.

Originally from Michigan, this warm weather seeker relocated to the OC just last summer. Kelsey enjoys writing her own fictional pieces, reading a variety of young adult novels, binging on Netflix, and of course soaking up the sun.

You can find more about Kelsey on her LinkedIn profile or on Twitter @dykstrakelsey.