Guys, Please Don’t Use Emojis Instead of Words When You Text Me—Thanks

When it comes to relationships, it feels like so many people opt for smirking and winking emojis instead of actual words that could kickstart a meaningful conversation. Not only are they a cover for dudes who probably don’t consider themselves to be good with words, they’re also an excuse to be lazy as hell. I’m over it.

An emoji doesn’t warrant a reply. 

Sorry, but a winking face with the tongue sticking out doesn’t qualify as a response to my six-line text. I know it’s cute, but it took me some time to write my message while it took him a second to insert an emoji in his response. And no, I refuse to send him another emoji as a reply to his confusing non-reply to my message. The idea that an emoji calls for another emoji just to keep up the conversation is kinda insulting. It’s akin to suggesting that while being out on a date, a person should keep talking solo to someone who just grimaces in response.

Over-emojing has no real emotional value.

Emojis should be reserved for expressing legitimate emotions and moods. That’s their original purpose, right? When someone puts an emoji in every sentence, or worse, replaces words with emojis, it just feels like he has nothing to say and is just putting in whatever to remain in my good graces.

The conversation just dies after getting one. 

Let’s be honest, an emoji is the quickest way to kill a conversation. Am I supposed to be over the moon at his kiss-blowing face when he hasn’t added anything significant to it, like for example that he likes me and wants to ask me out? If he really wanted to keep up the conversation, he’d add actual words.

It actually shows me that I’m wasting my time. 

Emojis, GIFS, and memes have given all lazy, indecisive, and emotionally stunted men a new creative way to remain ambiguous and procrastinate ’til eternity. Just don’t get carried away in a hopeless exchange of goofy faces thinking that they’ll lead somewhere. In my experience, the more emojis he uses, the less likely he is to take action.

They can be easily misinterpreted.

Sure, sometimes an emoji is a genuine symbol of affection and interest and the sender might actually believe that it’s an important demonstration of his feelings towards you. That holds true especially when someone has never sent you an emoji before and then out of the blue sends one. When this happens, I can’t help wondering if this has some kind of secret meaning that I’m supposed to grasp. I try not to drive myself crazy with it, but ugh, it’s unnecessary confusion.

The chemistry eventually fizzles out. 

Emojis can either build up sexual chemistry or they can suppress it to the point of no return. The problem is that most people don’t realize that flirty emojis should be used strategically rather than quantitatively. Exchanging too many pointless emojis usually ends up with two very bored people killing time on their phones instead of doing something that’s actually fun.

Emojing and friend-zoning go together. 

While it’s OK to send a slew of emojis when I text my friends, the same doesn’t hold true when it comes to my romantic interests. As you know, emojis, like exclamation marks, have a magical way of taking all the seriousness out of a conversation. Before you know it, the person you have a crush on is acting like your best bud and then suddenly it’s out of character to even ask them out because, you know, you’re friends now.

I spend too much time trying to figure out their hidden meaning.

When I really like someone, I’m bound to waste a significant amount of time trying to figure out whether their heart-eyes emoji has a secret meaning or it’s just a courteous way of acknowledging that he’s seen my message. If I’m honest, I just don’t have the energy or the time to decipher ambiguous texts. If he likes me, he should just lay it out there and ask me out.

Words are sexier than symbols anyway.

Since they were invented, they’ve been so overused that I actually like it so much more when someone doesn’t use emojis at all. A guy who isn’t afraid to say what’s on his mind is incredibly sexy. And yeah, using an emoji here and there definitely doesn’t hurt, but that should happen only after he’s shown me that he is capable of communicating with words.

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