Guys, This Is Why We Ghosted You

Guys, This Is Why We Ghosted You ©iStock/BraunS

Ghosting isn’t just something guys are guilty of. Women do it too, but we like to think we have more legit reasons for it. If you’re wondering why we went out with you and then you never heard from us again, this should help:

  1. You insulted us. If you call us short or too tall or say anything super rude on a first date, you should never be surprised that you get ghosted. It just comes with the territory. Think of it like simple first date math.
  2. You freaked us out. Here’s a PSA: if you’re really creepy, that’s not cool to say the least. Unfortunately, there are all kinds of weirdos out there, and we tend to meet them via online dating (we’re looking at you, Tinder).
  3. You only wanted to hook up. We’ve been there, done that. Know we’re so over it. If you made it clear that you only want something casual, we’re ghosting because we’re looking for something real. We know, you think that’s crazy. You’re entitled to your opinion, you’re just never going to see us again.
  4. You didn’t get us. We want a guy who really sees us for who we are. He gets our dreams, he supports us, he’s right there with us on the same page. If you seemed confused when we joked about our workaholic tendencies or shared stories, you’re not getting a second chance.
  5. You bored us. Sorry, we’ve been on way too many super dull dates to feel bad for ghosting another super dull guy. There’s no pain like sitting across from someone who drones on about their job or only gives one-word responses. No thank you.
  6. You were selfish. Did you think you were on a first date with yourself? Because that’s how you acted. You talked the entire evening and didn’t seem to understand why we left after only an hour. Don’t even try to whine that we ghosted you because you deserved it. It takes two to make a first date amazing.
  7. You took the lame three day rule seriously. It’s not the ’50s anymore. It’s not even the 2000s.  If you waited several days or even a week to text us after our first date, it’s no wonder we’re no longer interested. A real man gets that when you meet a good woman, you don’t waste time.
  8. You acted like we were yours already. Nope, we don’t belong to you. And we definitely never will now.
  9. You weren’t BF material. Responding to every single guy who wants a second date can get tricky and exhausting, not to mention super stressful. It’s tough to know what to say without hurting someone’s feelings. If you just weren’t right for us but we can’t even put our finger on why, we can’t exactly text that our gut isn’t in it. So we ghost. It’s not a perfect system, but you do it to us, so all’s fair in love and texting.
Aya Tsintziras is a freelance lifestyle writer and editor from Toronto, Canada. In addition to writing about dating and relationships for Bolde, she also writes about movies, TV, and video games for ScreenRant and GameRant. She has a Political Science degree from the University of Toronto and a Masters of Journalism from Ryerson University. You can find her on Twitter @ayatsintziras and on Instagram @aya.tsintziras.