Guys, Women Aren’t Difficult To Please—A Lot Of You Just Aren’t Trying Very Hard

Most men like to see themselves as low maintenance creatures, especially when it comes to relationships. Many of them simultaneously write women off as needy, clingy, and a bit of a pain at times due to our impossibly high standards. Yeah, right—enough with the silly stereotypes.
  1. A lot of guys don’t even know what they need/want. I saw a meme on Facebook that claimed all men need is regular sex, good food, women who don’t snoop through their phone, and to be left alone. WTF? While memes are intended to be funny, there’s always a kernel of truth in every joke. Are men less complex than women? Maybe, but that doesn’t mean they don’t have more complicated needs than getting laid and being fed. Maybe they’re just not willing to do the self-reflection necessary to know themselves and figure out what else they’re after in life.
  2. When they do help, most of them want a statue erected in their honor. I’ve heard several guys complain that when they don’t help around the house, their partner complains, and when they do, they get no recognition for it. Well, do you notice and appreciate every time your laundry washes, folds, and hangs itself in your closet or when your food is magically cooked, plated, and placed right in front of you? If you don’t show gratitude for all the work we do, why should we fall at your feet in appreciation when you clean one dish or fold your laundry once? You should help around the house because you understand this needs to be done and you want to prove that you and your partners are equals, not for a pat on the back. That being said, it’s nice to thank your partner for their hard work from time to time, man or woman.
  3. To get a lot, you need to give a lot. Why is this such a difficult concept to understand for some people? In any relationship, whether platonic or romantic, it sucks when one person is giving it their all and the other doesn’t care. All those things you say women want from men (attention, warmth, honesty, passion, etc.) are the things women are already giving to their partners or are at least expected to. Desiring the same amount of effort in return isn’t asking too much.
  4. Sex alone does not happiness make. If all you want from your girlfriend/wife is for her to satisfy all your appetites, then all you have is satisfaction, not happiness. I don’t know about you, but I always strived for a higher grade than “satisfactory” in school. All the same, if all you have to offer women is sex, don’t expect us to be happy.
  5. Our standards are high because we know our worth. The meme also mentions that we expect our men to have all these attributes: good father material, dependable, athletic, warm, gallant, brave, romantic. How do we dare to want someone who’s dependable, warm, and will remember our birthday? Seriously, what kind of monsters are we?
  6. Men secretly have standards too. Newsflash: everyone has a list of things they look for in a partner, and it’s different for everyone. Just as women’s tastes vary, so do men’s—and I’m not talking about looks. Some men want a woman with a sense of humor, others want someone who has a high IQ. We can’t pretend that women are the only ones being picky.
  7. Some people are higher maintenance than others. I’m not going to deny that some women are high maintenance, but so are some men! Everyone is different, so lumping all of us women into one group and pretending to know what we all want will guarantee that you’ll be single for a long time. Get to know your lady and how she operates before putting the “ass” into assume. Ladies, that applies to us as well. It’s time to step out of the shadows of our assigned stereotypes.
  8. It’s not as hard as you think. Historically, less was expected of men when it came to relationships, so they didn’t have to try very hard. Now that times have changed and women are working as well, we expect more from men because they don’t have that excuse of being the sole breadwinner anymore. To many of them, it seems like a lot of work, but that’s because they wouldn’t know how to work at a relationship. Even a little effort can go a long way.
  9. We want a life-partner. Treat us with respect and put a bit of effort in. That’s literally all we’re asking for. How do we know that we are important to you if you don’t show it by being an active part of our relationship? Most of us don’t care about expensive jewelry or grand gestures; you can show us you care by asking about our days and actually listening to us (because we know you expect that in return). Prioritize our relationship because it’s important to us. And please, don’t take us for granted.
Ginnifer Bronstein is a freelance writer from New York. She enjoys writing about relationships, entertainment, and fiction. Her goal in life is to travel the world and be an accomplished writer, but she'll settle for stopping and smelling the roses.
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