You were happy before he came into your life, and now that he’s gone, it feels like you’ll never find that joy again. It’s just not there, no matter how hard you look — but you will be happy again. It doesn’t matter how badly he hurt you because he’s not the one who gets to steal your happiness. Not forever.
Your heart is tougher than that. You’re not going to let this knock you down forever. It may feel like you’ll never be happy again, at least not anytime in the near future, but that’s not true. You’ve got a heart that loves to love, and it will beat on despite the broken pieces he left behind. It won’t let you be unhappy forever.
Your happiness doesn’t depend on him. It’s cliche but it’s true. No one gets to control your happiness. It’s not an external switch; it’s internal, inside of you. You are the keeper of your own joy, and you’ll discover that in the days to come as you begin to put the pieces back together again.
You’ll find ways to heal. Sometimes it just takes a while to heal up the broken parts and patch over the cracks in your happiness. You’ll find new things to give you joy, and you’ll bring back the old tried-and-true methods of relief that only you know so well. You will find a way to get better and feel better, no matter how gradually. It will happen.
He doesn’t get to own your happiness. He doesn’t get to own the state of your feelings, and he doesn’t have the power to keep them from you. You didn’t sign over the deed to your heart to him. He may have been careless with you, but that doesn’t give him ownership of your joy. Taking that back from him is the part that you have control over. You can do it.
You’ll deal with the grief. Grief is normal, but it can cloud the rest of your feelings. You don’t have to let it hide the other parts of you for long. You can process the grief while still feeling and enjoying the rest of your life. Focus on the little things — buying yourself flowers, enjoying your favorite meal. Let the grief come, but don’t let it blot out everything else.
He walked away, but your capacity to feel joy didn’t. It’s hard to believe that sometimes, but you have to. He’s gone, but your love of life itself is not. Remember that in times of pain. This is not the end. Your heart will rebound and you’ll love and feel happiness again. It just takes time.
When it feels the roughest, you’ve got to hold onto hope. This is where you’ll really be tested. Can you hold on to the hope of finding your joy again when everything feels dark? This is the resiliency you need to cultivate for your life in general. You will thank yourself later for refusing to give up.
You’re stronger than he thinks. He believes he’s broken you, but that’s not true. Don’t give him the satisfaction of sucking all the enjoyment out of your life. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and get back to feeling everything you want to. He’s not right about you.
You’ll have to work at it. It will take some work, that’s unavoidable, but work isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Teach yourself to keep on trying, to keep reaching for happiness. You won’t regret it.
Do what you love. It’ll re-energize your ability to feel joy again. The things that bring you satisfaction are the things that will reintroduce happiness into your life. Make art, spend time with friends, take a yoga class, spend an entire day doing nothing at all. Do the things you love so you can feel again.
You’re kickass and resilient. Even when it doesn’t feel like that’s true, it is. You are so much stronger than you know, and it’s in times like these that this is proven. You’ll start to feel that spark of joy sooner or later, and when it comes, you’ll nurture and protect it like it’s your child. You’ve got this, and you’ll be okay. Promise.
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