Help Your BFF Hook Up: How To Be The Best Wingwoman

Help Your BFF Hook Up: How To Be The Best Wingwoman ©iStock/Courtney Keating

When it comes to finding love (or a guy to have fun with), it tends to be every woman for herself. But being a good friend sometimes also means being a good wingwoman. Not everyone is great at flirting and meeting new people. Sometimes it takes a really good introduction to get your friend comfortable. Here are 10 wingwoman moves every girl needs in her arsenal to use the next time she has a girl’s night out.

  1. Practice before going out if she’s really shy. It might feel silly and a bit insincere, but if your friend is the type to freeze like a deer caught in headlights during social interactions, then this is a must! Pretend to be that hot stranger at the bar, and have your BFF try to hold a conversation with you. If you notice anything wrong, don’t be afraid to give her feedback.
  2. Find the best guy there for your friend. She might be doing this herself, or she could be the type to be too intimidated to look. Either way, keep an eye out for her type, whatever that may be. Then point him out to your friend, and make a plan on how you’re going to approach him so she isn’t blindsided.
  3. Have an ice breaker at the ready. This is the hard part if you’re not the type to make the first move. Remember, this is about your friend, so you shouldn’t be too on edge or worry about what he’s thinking about you. Go up and say hi, then ask him a few things about himself and tell him about your bestie. Use that information to relay back to your friend. Are they into similar music? Do they have a similar background? Anything small can be built upon – remember that!
  4. Let guys know why she’s so awesome. Gather your funny stories about your friend before you even hit the bar. When the drinks are flowing and you make it past the greeting, you can start talking your girl up. If you tell a story, it obviously shouldn’t be embarrassing but shows off something positive about her. Also, does she have an awesome job? Is she really talented at something? Don’t be afraid to throw that out there and see where it goes.
  5. Distract the friend. So the guy your friend thinks she might be interested in has a friend. This is when you have to be selfless and spend time with the friend so your girl and the guy gets as much alone time as possible. Be friendly enough that the friend wouldn’t try to convince the other to leave. He’ll probably assume you’re into him. You definitely don’t have to hook up with him.
  6. Be the one with the escape plan. If your friend is no longer feeling it, then you should be the one to make the exit. Come up with a signal beforehand to know when she’s uncomfortable. You can make it simple: “Well, it was nice to meet you, but we’re going to head out.” But if he turns out to be a creeper, you could always say you’re going to the bathroom and bounce.
  7. Dish out the confidence boost when she needs it. Maybe she does want to stay and talk to the handsome gentleman, but her confidence is faltering. Don’t be afraid to take her to the bathroom for a pep talk, or text her some encouragement. Sometimes a wingwoman is just an awesome cheerleader.
  8. Know when she’s ready to fly solo. Have a signal for this so you know when you can leave. Depending on your friend, this time might come really early, or it might not come at all. Be comfortable with the idea that she might need you all night if she’s shy. If you don’t, it’ll just really ruin your night. But if she does want you to leave, then say you’re going due to having work the next day.
  9. Don’t let her leave empty-handed. If you both aren’t splitting up that night, make sure all of your hard work doesn’t go to waste. Try to remind her to get his number before the night is through. If she gets flustered and doesn’t remember, make sure you have a backup plan. This could be getting his friend’s digits in hopes that you can get the main man’s number for your friend later. It’s not an ideal way to get it done, but this is why you need to play nice with the friend.
  10. Be available that night or the next day for advice. So maybe your friend does go home with the guy. Success! But that doesn’t always mean you’re through. Try to be a text away for the rest of the night since she would be spending the night with a strange man. Also, plan to meet for brunch the next day to get caught up on what happened and to see if she needs any further advice.
Nicole Weaver is a staff writer for YourTango and regularly contributes to Hollywood, The Bolde, and Proud2BMe. She is a lover of all things entertainment meaning she spends most of her nights in New York binge watching television shows. Follow her on Twitter at @nikkibernice.
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